Tag: PNW

• Ozette Triangle Loop

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on May 10, 2021

  When I was 25 I got lost while hiking. Like…legitimately lost. I will never forget this hike, as it was the catalyst to being more prepared when I venture into the woods. When I was 29 I got lost again. I embarked on a 20 mile hike from the east to the west of Yellowstone National Park. This time it was slightly less intense, but equally frightening. It was inevitable for this Yellowstone hike, the trail was not well trafficked (very few tourists show up to YNP wanting to hike 20 miles into the backcountry), and there were endless bison paths deviating from the actual trail.

  It was a real mind game completing Mary Mountain.

  The point of these two stories is that I don’t like getting lost. I don’t reckon anyone really enjoys getting lost, but I really, truly, hate it. I panic quickly and my mind goes to the worst possible scenarios. I recently went for a hike on the coast that I anticipated would be as chill as an ice cream fresh from the ice cream man. The trail was easy – 9 miles all together on flat terrain forming a triangle with 3 miles in the forest, 3 miles on the beach, and 3 miles back in the forest.

  What could possibly go wrong?

  

  My first mistake of the day was buying a coffee from Starbucks without the ability to control how strong it was. I have perfected the science of a proper coffee to water ratio in order to ensure my blood sugar and my anxiety are both kept under control. I thought asking the barista to cut the coffee with half water would be enough, but let me tell you…it was not.

  4 miles into the hike my blood sugar plummeted so far down I’m convinced Hades felt it all the way in the underworld.

  My second mistake was overdoing my physical activity the days prior to this hike. I was cocky and anticipated it would be incredibly easy, but my goodness, walking 3 miles on loose sand is unbelievably annoying. If it weren’t for my exceptional hiking partner I would have lost my marbles. Low blood sugar, fatigue from too much prior activity, and unstable terrain set the foundation for an inexorable panic when we missed the last corner connecting the triangle from the beach back into the forest towards the parking lot.

  

  But wait, there’s more…

  Mistake number three was not downloading a map ahead of time, and neither of us had cell reception. The 3 miles of beach were hard to quantify because our pace was so slow from the sand. There was no clear indication of where to enter back into the forest, so we continued on the beach despite the fact it felt like we were literally walking for hours. (Spoiler: we WERE walking for hours.)

  By this time trepidation set in. My excess caffeine consumption had induced full blown anxiety that I tried to hide with my deafening silence.

  Logically my brain knew my life was not in danger (which I cannot say the same for on the aforementioned hikes I was lost on.) The problem with getting “lost” on this hike was the idea of having to walk the entirety of the beach all over again, back to where we started. This thought literally made me want to cease to exist. #dramatic.

  

  The tide was slowly starting to come back in, so naturally my mind envisioned being swept out to sea while on this endeavor to find the trail. We eventually took a moment to pause, eat something, and reevaluate where we might be. I had a divine intervention moment and decided to check my map app because I remembered that it still showed the blue dot location even without service. To my surprise I was also able to see the outline of the triangle and suddenly the heavens opened up.

  My cortisol levels were still on high alert, until by the grace of God we found the trail. What was meant to be 9 miles, turned into 14.5, and what was meant to be a triangle turned into…a kite.

  

  We had walked an extra 2.5 or so miles off track, away from the trail.

  Once we found the trail it was smooth sailing. I had a pep in my step again, and the second half of the woods were just as beautiful as the first. I don’t know what it is about loosing the trail, but it instills a sense of control loss for me, and I am a control f r e a k. At the end of the day the hike was mostly enjoyable, the weather was perfect, and I developed an unexpected bond with my hiking partner.

  Nothing brings two people together like fear. #dramaticagain

  

  

  I probably won’t be doing this hike again…ever, but now that I am safe in the confines of my home I can say I had a good time. I cannot deny my crippling overthinking at times, but I will say my trust has gotten better as I have gotten older. In these moments of fear I pray like I’ve never prayed before, and somehow that helps.

  Getting lost is sometimes inescapable. Whether it be on a hike, while driving around a new city, or while navigating life.

  

  Morals of the story: always have a map for trails that are not well marked, trust your gut when you think you’ve walked too far, don’t aggravate your anxiety with stimulants, don’t hike with people whose name start with the letter D (all three of these hikes I got lost on I was with one other person whose name started with a D.)

  Q: What’s your wildest “oh sh!t, I’m lost” story?? I can only hope I never have any crazier than this. I’ve been lost in other countries before, but somehow I don’t panic nearly as much as I do when I am lost in the woods.

  

  | 37 Comments Tagged Hiking, PNW, Washington

• Washington Beaches

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on May 3, 2021

  All my life I have never been much of a “beach person.” If you were to ask me whether I prefer the beach or the mountains, my answer without hesitation has been and always will be the mountains. When I think about the beach I think of hot, overcrowded tourist spots filled with obnoxious humans who don’t understand the concept of personal space. There is however an exception to this rule, and that is a Pacific Northwest beach.

  More specifically, a Washington beach.

  

  A Washington beach has people, and they might even become overcrowded, but something about their rocky shores and cooler temperatures make them feel a bit less…overwhelming. When I think of a Washington beach I think of an overcast day with waves crashing dramatically onto giant beached logs or rocks. A Washington beach is enjoyable during all seasons, but I love the tranquility during the cooler months when less people come out to play.

  I also adore bundling up with a jacket, a blanket, or another person.

  

  I’ve been spending more time on the beach lately, and while initially I thought I wouldn’t enjoy spending a full day lying around doing mostly nothing, these beach days have become a highlight of my week. For the majority of my life I have struggled doing “nothing.” I always needed something to fill my time, and the busy “go, go, go” way of life was ingrained into my system.

  These days I am much better at sitting with stillness and allowing myself to just be.

  The fact of the matter is, when we think we are doing “nothing” we are doing more than we realize. On these beach days I am actively resting after a week of too much human interaction, substantial physical activity, and the inevitable stressors that come with being alive. Most beach days I do try to stay active for a few hours in the morning, but the remainder of the day is lounge city.

  One of my favorite beach days last month was a trip to Fort Worden, an old military establishment with bunkers dating back to WWI.

  

  

  If walking around old, dark military forts doesn’t tickle your fancy, there is a beautiful light house from 1913 at the tip of the beach. I can only imagine the stories this lighthouse holds. I don’t know what it is about lighthouses, but I find them oddly mysterious. Perhaps it’s because they are rare these days, and their origins often date back further than three of my lifetimes, or perhaps I have watched too many movies with old abandoned lighthouses.

  Either way, I find them fascinating and my imagination runs wild with the possibilities.

  

  

  One of the many things I love about Washington is the ease of accessibility to the coast in multiple directions. Each beach is similar for the reasons I listed above, yet slightly different from one another. With each beach you can expect to find a different view, a different type of sand, less or more beach glass, and better or worse hidden nooks to sprawl out while fighting with the sand fleas for a spot on the beach blanket.

  As summer gets closer I look forward to beach days turning into beach nights with some camping adventures. Now if only I could figure out how to include my cat on these beach outings…

  Q: Are you a beach person, or a mountain person?

  

  | 35 Comments Tagged Beach, PNW, Washington

• Things I’m Loving Lately

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on March 8, 2021

  Despite the fact I do not follow a Catholic faith, I decided to partake in Lent this year. I was raised Catholic, but I have moved towards more of a relaxed Christian faith that I am happy with. Still, I have participated in Lenten fasts in the past, but this year was different. This year I genuinely wanted to give up something to challenge myself on more of a mental and spiritual level, rather than a physical one.

  This year, I have given up social media.

  My blog has never been a space where I can escape from reality, so my presence here is “allowed” and encouraged. Instead I have given up Instagram and Facebook, one of which I can easily get lost on for hours looking at photos from strangers I will never meet. Initially I thought this would be difficult. I thought my addiction to the mindless escape of scrolling on Instagram would be a painful missing piece of my mental distraction repitour, but what I have found has been the complete opposite.

  Rather than curling up in a corner scratching at my face for the next fix, I am more present on here. I am more present with myself, I am writing more, and I feel calmer. My eating habits have been more balanced, my mood has been stable, and my sleep has been better. I’ve spent more time reflecting on deep thoughts as well as superficial “fun” thoughts.

  Thoughts that have inspired this post. Thoughts of random things I am enjoying lately. Let’s dive in, shall we?

  

  • I am enjoying wearing a Garmin watch without the obsession.

  I will forever have a soul tie to my OG Garmin Forerunner 110, but he is no longer with us. I bought that watch in 2011, and we made it through many, many runs together. What I loved most about the 110 was the fact that it didn’t have any bells and whistles. No calorie counts, no step counts, no heart rate counts, it was just a watch that turned into a GPS when you asked it to.

  I have avoided a new Garmin because of the bells and whistles. As someone who struggled with an exercise addiction and disordered eating it can be hard to separate from that extra data. If the day of movement wasn’t perfect it was bad news. So I stopped wearing anything, I stopped tracking movement, and I did the unthinkable – I intentionally gained weight and spent many days inactive. I truly believe this temporary hiatus helped me to have a more balanced approach to exercise.

  I now use a Forerunner 45, one of the more basic watches with just the right amount of bells and whistles. RIP to Gary my Forerunner 110 shown below.

  

  • I am enjoying new work skillz.

  I finally know how to change my own bike tire/tube. I’ll never forget the time I got a flat tire years ago. It was my rear tire aka the “entering Mordor tire” with regard to taking it on and off. I was successful in getting the tire off, took it into REI to fix, and everything was going great. Until I couldn’t get the tire back on.

  I accepted my failures and asked one of my neighbors for his help, a neighbor I had never spoken to in my life. I knew he rode bikes so I figured it was worth it to ask. He was most helpful, and as a thank you I baked him (and his family) cookies and gave them a pound of coffee (back when free coffee was up to my neck.) I left it on their porch and never heard anything.

  I hope his wife didn’t think I was hitting on him. Awkward.

  

  • I am enjoying spending money.

  Hear me out on this one…I am one of the most frugal people you will ever virtually meet. I hoard my money like I am preparing for some kind of apocalypse, and it’s honestly a bit ridiculous at times. I rarely if ever buy myself something, and it takes me a long time to justify a purchase unless I “need” it. Although “need” is such a relative term.

  I refuse to fall prey to consumerism, but I have been spending more money on myself lately. Buying nicer hiking gear, buying an extra pair of shoes, the aforementioned Garmin, etc.

  I will never forget something a small southern man I used to work with in Germany told me. We were talking about my frugality one day, and I was telling him about all the ways I tried to cut costs while traveling (like using a hostel pillowcase for a towel, perks of short hair), and he looked at me and said: “you cannot take your money to the grave.”

  Ever since then I’ve been more mindful about letting myself live a little. I can’t take it to the grave.

  

  • I am enjoying my obsession with “Happy Healthy Hippie – Go With The Flow Hormone Balance.“

  If you have been around these parts for a while, you will know I have a bit of a “crunchy granola” approach to most things in my life. I avoid pharmaceuticals, I rarely wash my hair, I spent an entire summer without wearing deodorant, I try to eat mostly whole foods, and shaving my legs is an afterthought to…everything.

  When my menstrual cycle returned after being gone for five years, I knew something was still off. My hormones were ALL OVER the place. Being the professional obsessor that I am, I spent far too much time on the Google trying to find out what was going on, until one day I decided I had to do something because my PMS symptoms were taking over my life. I know that sounds dramatic, but I am completely serious.

  No this post is not sponsored, however it SHOULD be. This blend is literally just a mix of herbs so I knew I had nothing to loose. And let me tell you…I have lost nothing and GAINED some of my sanity back.

  

  • I am enjoying winter hiking.

  I never imagined I would be someone who enjoyed hiking in the winter months. As someone who struggles with Raynaud’s I tend to avoid being outside in cold temps for long periods of time. Not only have I enjoyed winter hiking, my extremities have not fallen off like I anticipated they would.

  

  

  My hiking pals and I took a trip to the Hoh Rainforest last week, a place I hadn’t visited since I was 17. The last time I took a trip to the Hoh was for a team building weekend with my dad and a group of others who were all planning a trip to Mexico for a mission trip. All I remember from 17 year old Brittany’s experience was hating the five mile hike to our camp site, hundreds of thousands of black slugs, and being stuck with people I didn’t mesh with.

  Ultimately the mission trip was amazing, and it was all worth while.

  

  Now that I am an adult, and I enjoy hiking, five miles in (and five miles out) is no big thing. We hiked (or rather walked, this area is very flat) to “Five Mile Island” where we enjoyed some snacks and views before heading back. Lush green trees, mossy rocks, waterfalls, ferns large enough to engulf an elk, and rivers rushing loud enough to lull any white noise lover to sleep.

  Worth the three hour drive, five hour walk, and three hour drive back.

  

  Life without social media feels good. I am reading more, I am listening to amazing music, I am daydreaming about people and places and adventures to come. When Lent comes to an end I plan to be more intentional with my time spent online. Life feels good right now, and I am enjoying this whole “one day at a time thing.”

  After all, today is all we have.

  Q: Have you ever taken a significant break from social media?

  

  | 43 Comments Tagged Biking, Garmin, Hiking, Hormones, Lent, Life, PNW

• Duckabush River Trail

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on March 1, 2021

  When I first started hiking more consistently in 2014, I spent most of my time exploring the Cascades of Washington State. I dabbled a bit in the Olympics, but not nearly as much as the Cascades. My first consistent hiking partner lived in Seattle, an area much closer to the Cascades, so I would meet him in the city and we would go from there.

  Occasionally he would come to my side of the water where the Olympics are, but we both felt more of a draw towards the Cascades.

  Then my hiking partner moved, I couldn’t find any other willing participants, and I began hiking alone. My mountain range of choice was still the Cascades, because somehow I felt more comfortable hiking there alone. In the beginning of my solo hiking endeavors I spent a lot of time on trails I was already familiar with, but eventually explored some new to me trails as well.

  Fast forward many years, and I have spent more time in the Olympics this past month than I did in all of 2014.

  

  I have managed to weasel my way into a somewhat consistent group of hiking pals, and these adventures have quickly become a highlight of my week. I have recently seen three new areas of the Olympics, places I would never go if I were alone. There is something deep, and vast about the Olympics.

  This isn’t a bad thing, but there is an eerie energy about these mossy trees and muddy trails that give the feeling of complete isolation.

  

  In a group setting the strong sound of a raging river, or the absolute silence of wide open woods is welcomed. Alone, these auditory stimulations are a quick reminder of just how small we are in these endless mountains of trees and terrain. I have shared a few photos from my hikes the last month in previous posts, but today I share a proper trail report.

  The latest mountain adventure took my pals and I to the Duckabush River Trail, a 10.5 mile moderately rated hike deep in the heart of the Olympics. The early bird not only catches the worm, but also catches a good parking spot. Although hiking in the winter months on less populated trails will also help with that. All of the hikes I’ve done the last month have had little to no other humans around for miles.

  I’m stoked to have friends who also believe in the power of an early start, it can be like pulling an abscessed tooth with some people convincing them to get a head start.

  

  

  This trail starts out mostly flat with a bit of a down hill grade, weaving in and out of large lichen covered trees and a few small stream crossings. Despite the fact we were hiking in February, the trail conditions were excellent. Nothing a good pair of waterproof shoes cannot combat. It’s somewhat comical to think I have been hiking for as long as I have, and only recently purchased a pair of waterproof shoes.

  I still wear trail runners though, because I am adamantine with footwear and cannot commit to the extreme discomfort of a hiking boot.

  The weather was moody and wet for the first half of our hike, and despite the trail name there was only a small section that hugged parallel with the river. The terrain was ever-changing and the cooler temps were a welcomed reprieve when we reached some quick, but steep switchbacks bringing us to an expansive view of the valley below.

  I’m much quicker when the external temperature is cold, I give off heat like a personal portable furnace.

  

  

  Our first vantage point was a large rock fit for baby Simba, and we stopped to appreciate the view. After the switchbacks to this rock the trail is moderate again, moving onto the backside of the mountain we had just climbed. Endless rows of burned trees guided us down towards our destination next to the river. We encountered a small amount of snow on the backside of the hike, but nothing my Salomon trail runners couldn’t handle.

  Upon arrival at the river we sat and savored a snack before making the trek back to the car.

  The sit at the river brought my core temperature lower than comfortable, and I was quite chilly as we ate our snacks. As if by the Grace of God when we started our walk back the clouds dispersed and the sun came out to play. We were much quicker on the way back, per usual, and managed to finish the hike in a little over six hours. I appreciate the desire to stop and savor the views along the way, as well as the focus to get back to the car after we’ve seen all there is to see.

  

  

  This group of pals reminds me of the three solid guy friends I hiked with regularly while I was living in Yellowstone, one of which was my absolute savior during those intense but amazing months in the wilderness.

  When the spring and summer months arrive, I plan to spend more time in the Cascades. The sweeping peaks of those mountains are a welcomed challenge, one that will remind me of how fortunate I am to have found a balance in living life with an autoimmune disease. Each day brings forth new challenges, but I have dialed down what I need in order to keep up with these three hooligans, or any others I embark into the mountains with.

  Until then, I will relish in these lowland hikes through the woods of the Olympics. A forest unlike any other I have seen.

  

  Q: Are you a fan of winter hiking?

  

  | 27 Comments Tagged Hiking, Olympic Mountains, PNW, Washington

• Early Morning Confessions

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on May 1, 2018

  1. I finished. I’m done. I have a (debt free) bachelors of science in communication. I’m no longer a super, super, super, super senior!! The last two years have been dedicated to (finally) finishing college, but it hasn’t fully sunk in yet. #thanksstarbucks.

  

  2. My final week of college didn’t come without its trials. My laptop died the week I had a huge project due, and my final. Like 100% dead. It wouldn’t have been a big deal, but I needed multiple programs that were downloaded on that laptop. I ugly cried multiple times for the first time since I was in a relationship. #thisiswhyimsingle. 

  3. Everything happens for a reason, and since my laptop died before I was finished with college, I was able to use my college fund to buy a new laptop. A MacBook Pro to be exact. She is sexy as hell, but gave me mad anxiety when purchasing. Even though it was not my money being spent, I’m as frugal as they come and I got stress sweats from spending $2k on a laptop. #thanksmomanddad.

  

  4. This is my last week working for Starbucks. #allthefeels. 

  5. I went for three hikes last week. The third hike hurt and I felt like I was in the earthly version of hell. I think three was too much for my body, but the views were all stellar. #outofshape.

  

  Hike one I found my squad goals. All these men are ages 60-70.

  

  Hike two I found snowcapped mountains.

  

  Hike three I found my ego.

  6. I cried on the third hike for a solid two seconds before I told myself to get over it. Sometimes my mind (my ego) wants to do things my body can’t do. On that day my body could barely put one foot in front of the other. #humbled. 

  7. I tiptoed through the tulips for the second year in a row. Except this year the tulip fields were drowned by excessive rain and mud, so we drove around and found our own tulips to view from afar. #fofree

  

  

  8. I’ve been in a reaaalllyy good place with my physical health the last little while. I’ve been eating extremely high fat and low carb, including quality grass fed meats and my body is HUMMMINNGG with clarity. Basically meats, vegetables, and fats are what I’ve been eating. When you listen to your body, it rewards you. #everyBODYisdifferent.

  9. It was Hades hot in Washington last week. Most of us up north do not have AC, myself included, so when it’s above 75 I FEEEEEL it. I would have sold my first born child for a dip in Lake Crescent. #ioverheatQUICK

  

  Another photo from hike three.

  10. I’m happy to report I only had to return one pair of shoes to REI before finding the right ones. Against my better judgement I tried out a pair of hiking shoes that were ankle high. I took them on hike one last week, and it was immediate regret. So I took them back and got the same shoe….low top. #stickwithwhatyouknow.

  Q: What’s your confession?

  

  | 46 Comments Tagged Arizona State University, College, Early Morning Confessions, Hiking, PNW, Starbucks

• Lake Angeles

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on August 29, 2017

  I used to be extremely active. One season of my life I was training for my third half marathon while completing the Insanity DVD’s, and this was completely normal for me. I was never not doing something intense. Then I lost my period, and it would take another few years for me to realize perhaps it’s time to take things down a notch.

  

  Don’t get me wrong, I love the euphoria that comes from an extreme cardio session, but my body has been trying to tell me to take it down a few notches and I’ve chosen not to listen. It amazes me how loud and clear our bodies will communicate to us if we listen, the problem is that we’re usually so focused on other things we don’t hear the warning signs.

  The go go go mentality comes into play for me whenever I go for a hike as well, the mountain has to be bigger and badder than the one before or I don’t feel like I’ve accomplished much. The mountains aren’t close to me, so I’ve always had a certain rule when choosing trails.

  

  I LOL’d at this sign, if you look closely next to the 3.7 someone wrote “More like 5.”

  My rule is that when it comes to a hike, I need the time spent on the trail to be longer than the time it took to drive there. On average, it takes me about two hours to get to a good hike meaning the actual hike will ideally take 3 hours or more. This means the trail needs to be at least 7 miles RT or more. 

  I realize how ridiculous this all sounds. I can’t say all my marbles are straight, but I’m actively working on pushing them closer together in a somewhat uniformed line. I don’t hike as much these days in an attempt to re-balance my body (still no consistent periods, but I feel we’re getting closer) and I really don’t enjoy running so that had to go too, but if I find a friend to tag along on a hike I’ll go.

  

  Before setting off to conquer Lake Angeles, I found myself slipping into old habits. Originally when my friend asked if I wanted to go for a hike, I got onto the Washington Trails website to find a big and bad hike to conquer. I must also mention I’m not at all in the shape I was when I was running half marathons and doing Insanity, meaning big bad hikes are more painful than enjoyable these days.

  

  I originally chose a different trail to explore. Higher elevation, and longer distance. Because, why not. I woke up at 3am the morning of the hike with a lump in my stomach telling me this was not the trail I wanted. I was dreading the adventure, and that’s no fun. I remembered that I’m trying to respect my body and not destroy it, and made the change to Lake Angeles last minute.

  At 7.4 miles RT with an elevation gain of 2350′ this was more than enough. It kicked my out of shape butt in all the right ways. This also happened to be the week that Washington was hit with a shitton of smoke that was pushed our way from the BC wildfires, as you can see in all of these photos, so taking it easy was ideal.

  The smoke gave me terrible headaches. I can’t imagine what it was like in Canada. 

  

  The point of this post is to remind me, and to encourage you to listen to our bodies. When things are out of balance it’s for a reason and the only way to know is to slow down and listen. It’s a challenge for those of us with obsessions or addictions to certain lifestyles, but without challenges we will never grow.

  We are constantly bombarded with people telling us that we are lazy if we don’t want to workout, or unhealthy if we want to eat the cake, but at the end of the day only you know what’s best for your body and soul. For too long I told myself I was lazy if I didn’t go for a run, or climb a bigger mountain, but you can only force something for so long before the joy is zapped from it.

  

  Hiking is meant to bring peace and calming (with some blood flow) and satisfy my urge for exploration. It shouldn’t be just a way to sweat. I’m reminding myself to stop and smell the roses, not just view them from the top. Hiking is so much more enjoyable when you savor the journey, and it just so happens this is a metaphor for life too.

  Rest if your body tells you to rest, move if your body tells you to move, eat the cake if your soul tells you to eat the cake, or avoid the cake if your body tells you the sugar is not working for you. Listen to your body, it’s smarter than any media article or science guru combined. The key is learning what to listen for.

  

  Life is not about perfection, all we can do is strive to improve who we are today from who we were yesterday. Just be sure to give yourself grace along the way. 

  Q: What activities are you not enjoying lately that you used to love? For me it’s running. So now I bike!

  

  | 62 Comments Tagged Hike, Lake Angeles, Life, Mountain, PNW

• Where I Find My Therapy

  Posted at 10:15 AM by Brittany, on May 4, 2017

  A couple weeks ago I went to the Skagit Valley Tulip Festival, an annual celebration of all things tulips. I had never been before, but it was a gorgeous sight to see. The drive is not close, but my family and I were able to turn the adventure into a full day trip.

  This post will showcase those photos, but the topic will be completely unrelated. 

  

  

  Today I want to talk about therapy. Counseling. Seeing a shrink. There comes a time in most peoples lives where this is a necessary step to take in order to heal from trauma. Trauma can take many shapes and forms from loosing a loved one, to loosing yourself.

  

  Because you never know when you need to locate the garlic.

  

  I’ve gone to therapy a few times in my life, but usually because I was forced to go. I went when I was very young, probably around age 6-8 to help me process my emotions because I was an outspoken child from the beginning of time.

  The next time I went to therapy was age 17. I was ordered to see a counselor because I had a few bouts of skipping school. It was a court order, so there was no negotiating this one. I’ve come a long way from my high school escapades. 

  

  

  My only memories of tiny Brittany therapy are playing with animal figurines in a sand box. I also remember this was the first time I learned my arms were double jointed. Random. My 17 year old memories were strictly check list related. I showed up, talked very minimally, got my check for being there, and left. I didn’t like it much.

  

  

  The older I get the more I understand the power and value of therapy, but I also realize that this is not always the answer for everyone. Society tells us that if we are experiencing troubles that we need to go talk to someone about it, and there is complete validity there, but I don’t think there is a one size fits all method for everyone.

  There is no shame in going to counseling. These people are specialized in pulling us out of our funk in ways we may not be capable of doing alone. But is speaking aloud about our trials the only way to heal our wounds?

  

  

  Black tulips. My life is complete. I need dis.

  Long time blog readers will know I’ve been going through a phase of life where I feel lost. I’ve always been an open book about my struggles because we ALL have them, and there should be no shame in speaking about them. In fact sharing my life on this blog has been hugely cathartic for me, and many of you guys relate to the words I share.

  There is no time limit on when we will heal from pain, and we are each on our own journey, and we each heal in our own way. Per the request of friends and family, and eventually from my own mind I decided to try speaking to a therapist the last few months about things I’ve been dealing with.

  

  I have a hefty amount of residual trauma from relationships, friendship, not properly dealing with my stress, anxiety about what I can and cannot eat (thanks to an autoimmune disease and restrictive/binge eating habits), and occasional depression that accompanies isolation and poor weather.

  SAD is real ya’ll.

  None of these feelings or emotions define who I am, and I have stayed extremely positive (for the most part) throughout all of this because I know it will pass. I also know that traditional therapy has not been for me. I find my therapy outside in the woods. I find my therapy on a run with rain falling on my face. I find my therapy drinking coffee with a friend. I find my therapy by believing all things happen for a reason.

  I find my therapy by just breathing. By being. By living in the moment. By eating a balanced diet that works WITH my body.

  

  I was on a solo hike last week and my mind looked like a bee hive at the peak of honey production. There were so many thoughts and emotions swirling around my brain, and I left that mountain feeling so calm, and so at ease. My therapy doesn’t come from sitting on a couch with a specialist that may or may not know what I need, my therapy comes from diving deep within myself and allowing myself to sit with my emotions, the happy, the sad, the good, and the bad.

  I’ve been in a really good place lately, and this post is coming to you from the tail end of most of this, but the revelation of these thoughts just came to me. I in no way think standard therapy is a bad move, in fact I’m glad I tried again because it confirmed this isn’t the only answer for me. I took some of the tools I learned and was able to utilize them on my own.

  

  Ultimately the moral of every story is that we need to do what is right for us as individuals, not what is right for someone else. Sometimes we need a push, and sometimes we need to be drop kicked off a cliff. Whatever that shove may be for you embrace it fully and chase after what makes you come alive. When one area of life gets out of balance it can turn into a snowball.

  Spirit, mind, body. All must be balanced.

  Our world has tucked mental health under the rug and topics of depression, anxiety, fear, and loneliness are taboo. No one wants to talk about them and no one wants to admit they feel them, but we ALL feel them. We wouldn’t be human if we didn’t! We are molded to believe there is something wrong with us if we aren’t feeling like a cast member of The Wiggles all the time.

  But that’s not real life. 

  

  

  The next time you find yourself in the midst of chaos, trauma, or pain, remember these feelings and experiences are serving a purpose. Don’t try to run from the pain, but instead try running towards it. Let these natural human feelings work their way through your soul and morph you into someone new. Let them teach you about who you are.

  Find what works for you in moving through this time of your life whether it be therapy, painting, meditation or hiking. Eat well, rest often, and stress less. When all else fails, find a field of tulips to tip toe through, I dare you not to laugh in the process.

  Where do you find your therapy?

  

  | 99 Comments Tagged Hiking, Life, PNW, Tulips

• Tumwater Falls Park, Olympia WA

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on April 10, 2017

  When I have too much free time I get antsy. While I’m much better at just “being” than I was a year ago, sometimes an adventure is all that will do. For the times I want to get away, but don’t want to fully submerge myself in the woods, I find local (or semi local) places to explore.

  

  Last week an adventure took me to Olympia, the capitol of Washington and a city I spent a lot of time in a handful of years ago. It’s about an hour away from me, and I quite enjoy this city thanks to its low key vibes and its lake. I love the lake, I’ve run many miles around the lake.

  

  

  While this most recent trip did take me on a loop around the lake, up close and personal with the capitol building, and gave me a hug in a mug from a local coffee shop, the highlight was wandering around Tumwater Falls Park, a not so hidden park just a hop skip and a jump away from the lake.

  

  The falls you see upon entering the park aren’t filled with Hawaii like blue waters, the water looks like it was urinated in by a flock of seagulls, but the sounds of the rush are soothing. The park takes you on a .5 mile loop which I walked twice. It takes about 20-30 minutes depending on where and how long you stop.

  No rush here, it’s all about soaking in the beauty. 

  

  

  The trail takes you right alongside the rushing rapids, if you close your eyes and sink deep into your imagination it’s almost like being on the Grizzly River Run at California Adventure. You know, minus actually being in the water.

  

  

  My favorite part of this trail was a spot at the lower falls, where the loop brings you towards the other side of the trail. This spot brings you to a view of the old Olympia brewery, which apparently made the best beer in 1906. They claim “it’s the water” but I’m hoping they don’t mean the water in the falls.

  

  

  Brewery peaking over the trees.

  This lower fall area brought me up close and personal with a spot that gave me nostalgia from my Niagara Falls trip last summer. Not nearly as miraculous, but baby feels were still there.

  

  

  I also found a tree forest that spoke to my inner 12 year old. 

  

  While this spot is popular on the weekends I’m sure, I was able to go on a weekday and only encountered a handful of other people. It’s right next to the road so you wont be submerged by any means, but it’s still a nice escape for a walk. My favorite spots were the mini waterfalls along the way.

  

  

  If you’re anything like me and get hungry every 87582735 seconds there is a restaurant overlooking the main falls area. Or, there is a picnic area to eat your own food. Options people, options.

  

  Restaurant upper left.

  Just the nature boost my soul needed.

  Q: What’s your go to when you’re feeling bored? I try to read more, but my tried and true is getting outside. 

  

  | 59 Comments Tagged Explore, Olympia, PNW, Waterfall

• Coffee and Compadres

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on February 21, 2017

  Last Wednesday I celebrated another year of life. 365 more days of sunrises and sunsets, 365 more days of coffee sips and cupcake eats, 365 more days of snuggles with my cats, and 365 more days dreaming of the mountains.

  

  I’ve never been one to take off of work for my birthday, however I don’t work Wednesdays right now. I decided to spend “the day my mom blessed the earth with my presence” by combining three of my favorite things: coffee, cupcakes, and hiking.

  

  My hiking partner, who also happens to be my work partner, but most definitely not my life partner, took the day off of work to spend the day with me exploring. We left at 07:00 and we were stuck in traffic far longer than either of us would have hoped.

  As one of the many cars aggregated together on the road I found multiple reasons to smile, the most obvious being that I was not on my way to work like the majority of those around me. Another reason was the delirium that started to take over my brain from sitting too long. A pit stop at Starbucks nearby our destination was in order to fill up my tumbler.

  Waiting until we were close to our location ensured the coffee was still warm upon our arrival at the summit.

  

  

  The forecast called for rain, and despite the fact I never quite know if this is going to be true in Washington or not, it did indeed rain. In fact, it was somewhat of a downpour most of our hike. Thankfully it was warm enough outside that the rain wasn’t uncomfortable.

  Dare I say it was fun?

  

  My right hand man was kind enough to stow my cupcake in his pack because I carried the coffee in mine. In all my years hiking I’ve yet to drink coffee at the summit of a mountain. It was time for this to change, and a birthday seemed like the perfect day to change this.

  

  

  Hiking alone is great, and I often prefer it, but when I’m alone I don’t have anyone around to capture my true beauty as these candid outtakes showcase. The rain was a nice touch giving me a true drowned rat look.

  

  

  My name is Brittany, I am 28 years old, and I have zero shame. 

  I chose an easy hike, only 4 miles RT taking two hours of our time. This time of year I tend to stay away from the snow packed peaks, I’m still traumatized from this adventure.

  

  I’m humbled when I embark on a hike that was once easy as slicing pie, and find that it winds me. Instead of letting this destroy my mental peace I use it as motivation to get back to a place of strength that I know I am capable of. This hike was doable, and I surely could have kept going, but there were moments I found myself out of breath.

  A few days prior I embarked on a local 9.5 mile RT hike, one that took 4 hours. This hike was tiring, but in different ways. Just as running challenges different muscles than swimming, hiking trails of differing elevations and distances challenges different areas of my body. My birthday hike challenged my heart rate more, and the longer local hike challenged my hip flexors more. I love variety.

  

  Local hike views.

  

  I bought myself a new pair of day hike shoes thanks to REI’s garage sale. They were worn maybe once, and returned because they were “too heavy.” Similar to my previous day hikers I snagged these hideous pink/red walkers for $100 less than what they would have been brand new. Sold. I tested them out on the 9.5 miler, because I like to test my pain threshold.

  

  I love birthdays because they remind me that life continues to fly by, even when we feel like it’s stagnant. It’s never too late to take control of what we want to do with our time, who we want to spend it with, and how we plan to achieve happiness.

  As each day passes for me I become more in tune with what I want my life to look like, but my favorite part is that I become more accepting of the inevitable changes life entails. The ups and downs are all necessary, the emotions and trials we experience are normal, and the gut feelings we have are usually right. They all work together to write the stories of our lives. Are you living yours in a way that others would want to read about?

  Q: What’d you do for your last birthday? Post hike I ate my body weight in Thai food, and regret nothing. Autoimmune diseases take a back seat on birthdays. HA.

  

  | 75 Comments Tagged Birthday, Coffee, Cupcake, Explore, Hiking, PNW, Rattlesnake Ridge, Vegan

• The Grand Forest – Making Friends with Ferns

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on February 2, 2017

  I arrived at the forest around 10 am. I would later discover this time was comparable to the third bowl of porridge that Goldilocks tasted-not too hot, and not too cold. This arrival time was not too early, and not too late.

  

  Arriving at 10am meant there were other cars in the lot, but still a few spaces left. The parking is minimal here, and although I wouldn’t mind parking on the street, I do enjoy securing a space within the confines of an area where fast moving cars cannot nick the side of my vehicle. Other cars in the lot meant there were other people exploring the woods, which is a comforting sign for a solo adventurer.

  Cars in the lot, but a space left for me. Not too hot, not too cold. 

  

  I’d not yet explored this forest, but upon my arrival I was immediately overcome with feelings. Feelings of joy, feelings of excitement, feelings of energy, feelings of adventure. How had I lived so close to this forest, yet never stepped foot on its soil?

  

  These woods provided the illusion of being deep within the heart of a forest nestled below the mountains, but with a close proximity to the nearby roads. A common fear of solo adventurers is being so secluded that if something were to happen no one would know. These woods engulfed my being, but provided the comfort of safety should I need it.

  

  I arrived at the forest planning to walk, but the abundance of energy I received provoked me to run. Not hard, and not far, a simple thirty minutes which turned out to be one of the best runs I have had in a long time. The depths of the forest has a way of slowing down time. I didn’t focus on pace, I didn’t focus on distance, I simply focused on movement. What felt good, what didn’t? Time moved quickly and slowly all at the same time.

  

  The trails of dirt wove in and out of each other, reminding me of my childhood reading. I used to read books that allowed me to choose my own ending. “Go to pg. 167 for this kind of ending, or go to pg. 285 for this kind.” It allowed me to read and reread these books with a new story each time. The paths of this forest gave options that allowed me to cross similar paths from different angles, providing the continued illusion that this forest was larger than it really was.

  

  I crossed paths with a few people, but there was so much space between us all that it was easy to feel alone. My favorite. This came in handy for me when my run took a turn for the worse. Everything felt great, but I had consumed a beautifully balanced cup of coffee before arriving at the trail. I gave no extra thought to this decision as I allowed the full bodied notes of cocoa and nuts slide off my tongue. It was a harmony of flavor I tend to get lost in.

  It had been a while since coffee and running decided to scheme against me, but on this day they had. 

  

  There I was in the heart of this forest, with nothing but my car keys and a sense of endearment for my surroundings when the stomach discomfort hit me like a ton of bricks. I had no where to go but deeper among the trees. I prayed that the corner of earth I chose to stake claim of would provide me with enough privacy to release the demon within my gut.

  Runners trots are no joke my friends, there is no shame in this game. 

  

  I grew a new appreciation for ferns this day, we bonded on a level I hope never to bond with them on again. I can still feel the spores on my skin. I left a piece of me in the forest that day, and we are tied together in a way I’ll remember forever. Thankfully for the forest, ferns have the ability to absorb pollution. I love plants.

  

  Post expulsion I wandered the woods for another hour before calling it quits. I came upon abandoned sheds, the above tiny house nestled in the bushes, trails I didn’t get time to step foot on yet, and the below viewpoint. As I approached my car, others were waiting to claim my spot. Others had arrived to partake on their own adventure, I wondered if theirs would be similar to mine.

  I look forward to my next adventure in the Grand Forest, the trees and winding paths quickly became a local favorite, but next time I think I’ll finish my coffee before I leave.

  

  Q: Have you ever become one with the forest this way? Insert the *laughing with tears* emoji.

  

  | 33 Comments Tagged Adventure, Explore, Hike, PNW, Running

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