Tag: Life

• Why I’m No Longer Vegan

  Posted at 6:00 AM by Brittany, on January 26, 2017

  Alternatively titled why I’ve chosen to no longer feel like a bag of ass everyday. 

  This post was hard to write. I’ve been in denial for over a year now, and the only benefit of resisting the change that I knew I needed in order to heal my body is that I can honestly say I’ve tried it all. I tried with every fiber of my body to make a plant based diet work despite the growing list of health problems I have. With this, I have confidence in my decision should anyone try to argue with me about my dietary choices. Not that this should matter, it’s my personal choice just like any diet, lifestyle, hair color, or political position – we’re entitled to our own choice. BUT, I tried it all. Literally all of it. Perhaps it’s more for my own peace of mind knowing I gave it all I had.

  I’m going to include photos from a hike I went on yesterday in this post because the mountains are the only place that has brought me complete clarity this past year. 

  

  I didn’t struggle to write this post because I cared what other people thought, but rather because it meant I had accepted the change. Writing this post means I’m ready for the change, but getting to this point was a long and bumpy process. Change is hard, especially when you’re changing something you never thought you’d have to.

  Before I continue I want to make one thing clear. I do not by any means think a plant based diet is unhealthy, nor do I think there is a one size fits all way of eating. This post is based around my experience, my health issues, and my decisions to add animal products back into my diet. Albeit as I mentioned above, this was not easy. I’m writing this post because I want to be honest with my choices, and because reading articles about others that have had similar experiences has been immensely helpful for me.

  

  Let’s start at the beginning shall we? When I was 17 I went vegetarian. I watched 20 seconds of one factory farming video and that was it for me. I plunged into meat free life with ease and never looked back. I never felt a strong pull towards meat anyway, so the change wasn’t hard. I enjoyed this meat free diet for a handful of years before experimenting with veganism at age 23, a diet I thought I’d continue for life.

  My first year on a fully plant based diet was amazing. I thrived. I was enjoying foods in a way I never had before and I felt truly at peace with the way I was eating. I thank this time of my life for showing me a side of vegetables I hadn’t seen before. I am now beyond obsessed with these earthly foods and cannot imagine a world without leafy greens and broccoli. My diet became my lifestyle, and my lifestyle became my identity.

  Beet still my heart. 

  

  I’m not exactly sure where shit started to hit the fan for me, but despite the abundance of greens my diet was very grain heavy. I also consumed a good amount of sugar, which only progressed as time went on. My favorite way to celebrate after running a race was with a fat donut. Ohh the memories. I briefly talked about the beginning of some of my health issues in this post about stress, and after about two years on a plant based diet my health took a turn for the worse.

  I will never know if it was completely my dietary intake, or the outside factors such as chronic stress that affected me so poorly, but the end result remains the same. I have an autoimmune disease that has forced me to change my eating habits. I physically cannot eat a plant based diet successfully anymore unless I want to survive on leafy greens and broccoli. Most everything else sends me into a state of blood sugar crashes (including fruit) that leaves me foggy, tired, inflamed, bloated, and moody. Grains, fruits, even my beloved potatoes give me a headache, dry eyes, and such intense sugar cravings I’d sell my kidneys for a box of cookies.

  It’s truly both a blessing and a curse to be so in tune with my physical body.

  

  As I mentioned above I’ve been in denial. That means I’ve continued to try to make this square lifestyle fit into a circle shaped hole for over a year. That means I’ve been feeling God awful most days for over a year. I am what I eat, and I’ve reached the point where I can no longer bear the physical discomfort that has come with my denial. I’ve been living in the past thinking, “I used to feel so great eating this way, there has to be a way to make it work,” but as with all things in life this too has changed.

  So why has this been so hard for me? It should be easy eating a way that makes me feel good. It’s true, adding animal protein back into my diet (while also avoiding grains, basically paleo style eating) eases my symptoms and leaves my body praising with relief, like a cold damp cloth over an internal fire, but mentally I’ve struggled to get over the personal decisions to avoid meat which stem back to 17 year old Brittany watching those factory farming videos for the first time. I felt so passionately about my lifestyle that it became part of me, and I have mourned the loss of this part of me.

  

  I’ve mainly stuck to fish, but last week I bought a chicken. I’d eaten chicken before this last year, but this time I bought the entire body. I decided if I’m going to eat this “once living being” I need to be more connected to the source of it.

  As I was removing the meat from the bones I began sobbing. I cried such ugly tears as I verbally thanked the chicken for its meat (I didn’t know what else to do), and I later prayed that there has to be another way. This was an emotionally draining experience that haunted me the remainder of the week. To some this might seem silly, but think about something you feel a strong ethical pull towards and try to understand when you fight against this pull it’s no easy feat for the mind.

  Truth be told there is no other way. I go back and forth between a week of eating paleo and then I feel better, get ambitious and start eating vegan again and spiral right back to feeling like hell. I’m not talking cakes and cookies vegan, I’m talking basic whole grains and even fruits. 

  

  I’ve been in a state of limbo for so long I’m exhausted. I still stand by my ethical beliefs, but eating a plant based diet is simply no longer an option for me and my health. However this doesn’t mean I have to support factory farming. I’ve begun searching for local vendors that sell locally raised meats and fish. If I’m going to eat it I must do it right, the way God intended us to eat meat. None of this processed bull shit that we call food today, and none of the horror that comes from the torture of factory farming.

  It’s been hard, but as with all things in life it will get easier. I’ve tried to keep this post basic and straight to the point, but I assure you there have been so many more emotions and thoughts associated with this. I’ve been leaning heavily on my faith as I do in most times of struggle, and I verbally thank the animals (yes fish is meat, and an animal just like a chicken) I consume. If any of you have specific questions or concerns that you’d like to discuss please feel free to email me and I’m happy to elaborate.

  

  I’m still finding my footing on eating habits, and I’m aware this journey will forever be a learning process. My goal is to continue to fine tune my body and fuel it with whatever makes me feel best. I’m mostly consuming fish, as it’s the one animal product that makes me feel best. I’ll probably slip here and there, but my footing is already more sturdy today than it was yesterday.

  To end this post I just want to say I’m good. I’m writing this from a place of peace, trusting that my body knows best (spoiler: it does know best.) To all my plant based readers I hope you’ll stick with me for my mountain adventures, but if you choose to no longer read I completely understand. I won’t be blogging about meat, and the only food photos I’ll share if any will continue to be of plants, but just know for complete transparency I will be eating animal proteins. I’ll do an update post as time goes on.

  

  Mad love to all of you that have stuck with me on my journey the past while. And to my real life friends, thank you for dealing with my wishy washy back and forth decisions, and for putting up with my crazy. I realize how privileged I am to have this kind of decision in the world we live in and I assure you I don’t take it for granted. 

  

  You do you, and I’ll do me. 🙂

  Q: What was a tough decisions you had to make?

  

  | 102 Comments Tagged Life, Vegan

• 2017: Setting a Stress Free Tone

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on January 6, 2017

  Let’s talk about stress baby, let’s talk about you and me, let’s talk about all the chaos and mass destruction that can be!

  Stress – what a fickle beast. An unwanted wave of tension that stakes claim over our entire being if we let it. But what’s the big deal? Our bodies were built to endure stress as a survival method right? As with all things in life, our bodies can only handle stress in limited quantities, like when we’re being chased by a bear or waiting in line for sold out Justin Beiber tickets.

  It’s only when this tension builds to a point of chronic daily disruption that things go awry, the scary part is most of us don’t even know we’re stressed until it’s too late. Stress is a silent killer if left unnoticed, and I encourage each of you reading this to evaluate your stress levels. If you’re unsure of what this might feel like do some reading. It took me over three years to realize I was living in a hyper-stressed state.

  Brace yourselves, things are about to get slightly personal.

  In Jan 2014 I lost my period. In all honesty I didn’t think much of it and I felt fine. After months of ignoring it, I went to a doctor. One doctor led to five, all of them trying to give me a magic pill to jump start the red sea of life. “Nahh man I want to know why I lost this, not put a bandaid on the problem.” I hopped from doctor to doctor trying to get an answer. All the while the underlying stress was building.

  

  After all these doctors, zero answers, and a change in position at work (that I never really wanted) my stress levels were so high that I was having physical reactions. Rashes on my skin, inflammation, anxiety, food intolerance’s, all of which I thought were solely related to what I was eating. To an extent this was true, but in hindsight I now know it was stress that started it. I then went to see a naturopath hoping his naturalistic mindset would align with mine, but when he prescribed me a “seed rotation” (where he had me eating specific seeds to follow the moon) I pulled the plug.

  I confess I followed his moon dance ritual for two weeks before calling it quits. I believe in the pulls of the moon, and the universe, but this was where I drew the line. He also told me to start eating animal products and run less. I was desperate to know what was going on, so I obliged. Then shit really hit the fan. The mental stress of eating a way I didn’t feel right about sent me into a spiral that resulted in a year and half long eating disorder, something I’ve only recently gained a grasp on.

  I don’t feel any shame about this, it’s life and it opened my eyes to some destructive thoughts and behaviors. 

  The final straw this past October after seeing both a GI doctor and a Rheumatologist (putting my doctor tally at seven) was the diagnosis of an autoimmune disorder – one year and a handful of months after obsessing about what was wrong with me. I went from healthy and vibrant, to mentally and physically broken. Despite the wild ride I know this was a valuable time in my life. Without these moments of darkness we cannot truly know the light. Each dark path looks different for all, and this just happened to be mine.

  

  Protip: Eating a whole foods, plant based diet almost always prevents whatever ails you.

  Truth be told, if I follow this complex line all the way back to the beginning it tells me a story. A story of a girl that was letting small things get to her. The stress of running, the stress of being a perfectionist, the stress of “what am I going to do with my life,” the stress of an educational path I didn’t truly want, and ultimately the residual stress of a tumultuous relationship. The universe has a powerful way of slapping us in the face until we get it. Keep playing a broken record time and time again and you’ll get the same annoying loop, but change the record for a new one and you’ll hear a new song.

  Change your path and you’ll get a new result.

  It’s my three year anniversary of losing my period, and I’m back where I started. I’m back in a state of calm, and trusting that my body will balance itself out with a little help from me. (I had two normal slaps from aunt flo last year, one in September and one in December. So..things are happening.) The outside voices only caused more chaos in my body. Do I think that this kind of hormonal imbalance is normal? No. What I do think is that our bodies are amazing and will tell us when something is wrong. For me, stress has caused a whole heap of trouble and it’s time I focus on fixing this, my way. No magic pills.

  Disclaimer: I’ve had many, MANY tests run to ensure I’m not dying or void of any vital nutrients. My body is 100% healthy on paper, which made this all the more of a mystery, and all the more obvious that my body was trying to tell me something. I also tried it their way – I gained the weight, I ate the meat, I quit the running, but still no resolution. It wasn’t my diet or my running, but rather my attitude towards them and life in general. #stresslife.

  Along with adding more stress relieving activities to my life (yoga, walking, sitting in a coffee shop typing on my compute as I am now, making meals in the kitchen) the most important activities are the ones I need to remove. I’ve decided it’s time for me to stop running. Not completely, and not forever, but until I no longer dread the idea of it. A few posts ago I declared I was going to be training for my seventh half marathon. This was yet another attempt for me to get on track with exercise when in reality I don’t enjoy running anymore (unless it’s under 4 miles.) A 5k is still an accomplishment, it’s taken me years to accept this.

  

  Protip: Take a piece of wood, paint it, add hooks and you’ve got a cheap way to showcase your medals.

  There are so many other activities I would rather do, and I let running dictate my life for a long time, to the point of skipping out on these other activities because I “had to run.” Eventually I skipped out on exercise all together because I let my mind takeover. When you no longer want to do something and feel as though you have to do it, eventually everything will crumble. I’m so proud of my running accomplishments, and a solid 2-3 mile run still brings me joy, but anything more causes more stress than relief.

  Exercise is supposed to be an outlet for stress, not a cause. 

  Self sabotage and overthinking what I’m doing with my life has been a struggle of mine for years. Self acceptance and confidence is my biggest point of focus right now. Confidence in my choices, and in how I present myself. I preach about doing what you love, yet haven’t followed my own advice. I’ve had a lot of revelations the past year, and plan to make some solid changes this year. Finishing college is my main focus, and once that’s done I’ll do whatever I want. I live a minimalist life already and I don’t need a lot to get by.

  

  Protip: “Need” less things. This…is my wallet. A few months ago my wallet was stolen and I never bought a new one. I love how simple this rubber band cluster of cards fits into a small cloth bag.

  Surrounding myself with people that support my choices in life, lift me up, and encourage me to be myself are key. I will come in contact with people that try to make me feel like less than them because of what I do for work, or how I choose to spend my time, but the beauty of being happy with your life is that these people don’t affect you. The truth is these people are the ones that are suffering on the inside.

  The stress in my life helped catalyze a very negative mind space for longer than I would like to admit. This led to a poor attitude, of which I’m not proud, but I’m also not ashamed. I suppose you could say in this time I went full blown human, faults and all. If my attitude and negative head space could have taken on a physical persona I would say it looked an awful lot like Charlize Theron in the movie “Monster.” Not cute.

  I’m not one for new years resolutions, and I didn’t want this post to be like one, but this has been on my mind and on my heart for months. Having these thoughts is one thing, but allowing yourself to submit to them is harder than it seems sometimes. It’s taken me a while to form my thoughts into coherent words, and the words can’t hold a flame to the magnitude of how I feel on the inside. This is a brief view into my world and putting fingers to keyboard means I’ve found my way out of the murky waters and am ready to talk about it.

  I am thankful for the clarity, and living my truth is my resolution. My resolution for life. 

  

  Protip: Ride your bike. It’s an excellent stress relief.

  I’m still experiencing umbrella symptoms that accompany an autoimmune disorder. The top offenders for me are chronic fatigue, inflammation, painfully dry eyes, an overall feeling of “unwell” (some days), and I struggle eating grains, sugars and drinking coffee in certain amounts. I have to be diligent with the intake of some of my favorite foods (as we all should.) My focus is putting these symptoms into remission and I’m already heaps and bounds better than I was in October. Baby steps will help me find my way back to where I was. I’m thankful my condition isn’t nearly as severe as others, but an eyeopener nonetheless.

  If you’ve stuck with me through this post I commend you. It’s been a doozie to write and I’ve breached the 2050 word mark. It took me many months and even more drafts to finally hit publish, not because I was embarrassed, shameful, or worried what others thought, but simply because I didn’t quite have the right formation of thoughts. Sharing my thoughts is a therapeutic purge for me, and emphasizes my progress in life. The best part of this entire journey is that the solution can be simple, it just took a change in perspective, and some time for me to realize it.

  I want to end this post by challenging you to take a look at your life. Are you living your truth? Do you do things based on how others think and feel, or are you unapologetically living in a way that makes you happy? These are hard questions to answer and even harder to ask ourselves. We only get one shot on this earth and too many of us make it to the end of life with a bucket of regret. I want my bucket to be filled with joy, adventures, and more importantly with pride. Pride in anything that I do (except things that are immoral or illegal of course), regardless of how I am perceived.

  

  Protip: Care less what others think.

  There’s so much more I want to say, but I’ll end it here. I’ve written a handful of similar posts this last year, but I plan for this to be the last “ah-ha moment” post for quite some time. Gaining control of my thoughts means more adventure and upbeat posts to come. Control your thoughts, control your life. Happy 2017 to all of us that have made it this far, new year resolutions aside it’s time to start living your truth. What are you waiting for?

  How do you manage stress? I ask that you honor my thoughts and opinions should you choose to share your own. My approach and views may be different from yours when it comes to what is and is not healthy, but that’s what makes us each unique. 🙂 Thanks for reading. ❤

  

  | 85 Comments Tagged Life

• Navigating November

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on November 7, 2016

  With the blink of an eye here we are on November 7th. I hope you all had a wonderful Halloween, I stayed home and handed out handfuls of candy to needy children. I did wear black and orange striped tights to work on Halloween — tights that belonged to my sister, my significantly shorter than me sister, they ripped. In an uncomfortable location.

  I hated my commute that day. 

  

  Just because jack o lantern season is over doesn’t meant it’s time to put the pumpkins away. I found a place that honors October, November, and December all in one spot. We’re talking pumpkins in the front, Christmas tree’s in the back.

  When your seasons start to blur together.

  

  

  OK, I got my pumpkin patch fix for the year. Moving on.

  Work

  Work has been good, I’m finally at the point where I don’t feel new in my role. This is my first Christmas in the corporate building and they don’t mess around when it comes to celebrations.

  

  Play

  I managed three hikes last week. I’m trying to get them squeezed in before the white sheets of death plague us. I don’t like snow, I’m a Grinch.

  

  

  Don’t get excited, he’s my coworker.

  

  I’m severely out of shape, but can still manage to trudge along on some of the steeper hikes. The more out of breath I am the more of a reminder that I’m not moving enough lately. I’m the most out of shape (and heaviest) I’ve been in years, but the best part about starting at the bottom is there is no where to go but up.

  

  Eat

  Chipotle slapped me with the good karma stick yesterday and gave me so much guac, I surely had the equivalent of at least an entire avocado. Part of it was still in tact. Yes.

  

  I tried a new to me vegan place on the island. I’ve walked past it many times, but never bought a meal until now. It made my face all kinds of hot, but it was worth it.

  

  Life

  I recently watched Leonardo DiCaprio’s documentary Before the Flood. I was enamored by the way he brought this piece to life with information from a myriad of sources. I believe climate change is real, and the devastation that we are causing to this planet is mind blowing. Even if you don’t believe in the science, I encourage you to watch.

  Even if you don’t believe this is happening, if you have a soul you must realize the damage being done to the earth in order to gather fossil fuels, the devastation to our forests (which house the trees to filter the air we breathe!) to make way for new buildings, and the extinction of rainforests that house many species. 

  No change is too small to help reverse atmospheric CO2 emission from fossil fuel use and forest/land destruction. I originally adapted a plant based diet for ethical reasons, however I cannot help but believe this lifestyle to be immensely beneficial for the planet. Factory farms (specifically cattle) produce ungodly amounts of methane (CH4) gas. According to Leo’s film, every molecule of CH4 is the equivalent of 23 molecules of CO2. Insane. 

  I encourage you to think about what small change you can make today to help restore decades of damage. 

  Wednesday I fly off to California for this girls wedding. I’m not sure what shenanigans I’ll get myself into with my free time, but you already know it’ll be posted here sometime the following week. Happy Monday – do something nice for someone else today, and let’s reduce those carbon footprints one step at a time!

  

  Seen on my commute.

  Q: What are your thoughts on global warming? All views welcomed here. 

  

  | 47 Comments Tagged Explore, Hike, Life, Vegan

• Between a Rock and a Hard Place

  Posted at 5:55 PM by Brittany, on October 1, 2016

  I rounded out my Seattle house sitting adventures with one more adventure to the mountains, and two more adventures to local eateries. I’m settled back into my small town dwelling and it feels good to be home.

  

  It’s been a while since I got sappy on here, and because I typically blog what I know I’m feeling like an emotion purge right about now. When I started working in Seattle a couple months ago it was a nice shift in my life to distract me from the funk I was in.

  Fast forward to today and I’m feeling myself sliding back into that slump, and realizing it wasn’t just my job that was causing these feelings. It was a myriad of things, and they are all becoming more clear as time goes on.

  They say hindsight is 20/20, but I think hindsight is more like “perspective on steroids.” Your don’t need a perfect picture of it all, just a strong view into how you’ve evolved. 

  

  Food issues were at the top of that list, and I’ve been working closely with specialists to diagnose my health concerns, some of which are finally being solved. I think. I’m staying both positive and optimistic because I know everything works out eventually, and everything happens for a reason.

  School/stress was another issue and I’ve realized that I am an emotional eater. Like WHOA. Give me stress for one hand and you’d better have a dozen cookies for the other.

  

  School has been wicked stressful for me this semester, and I’ve wanted to quit 49385 times, but quitting is not an option. I’m only two semesters shy of finally graduating and you’d better believe when that moment comes I’ll be ugly crying tears of relief.

  Realizing stress is a huge trigger for me to emotionally eat has been a huge eye opener, and helpful for me to avoid binge episodes. For the most part. Constant work in progress. 🙂 Caffeine and coffee are another trigger for me, and I mentioned a while back that I was giving it up, and it was an odd time for me given that coffee was a large part of my platform and my passion.

  I’ve only recently come to a place where I no longer desire a cup. 

  

  It’s only slightly odd working in a building with over 30 kitchens filled with French presses, espresso machines, drip brewers etc and not partaking, but it’s becoming my new normal. That’s the thing with change – it takes time to get used to and in the beginning it can be hard. Really hard.

  It’s also been hard to find things to blog about lately. I get the desire to blog, to connect, and to write, but then when I think about what to talk about it all seems jumbled and chaotic. This used to be so cathartic for me and was such a large part of my life, but the last year has been full of posts like this rather than posts with baked goods and running.

   I am still sharing random cat shenanigans though. Some things never change.

  

  Was time for a new blog photo too. Featuring my main man.

  Long story short I think it’s completely normal when you know something is missing in your life, and things are confusing whether it be health related, job related, or personal, for everything else to feel slightly out of whack. Life is full of up’s and down’s, but we were born with ligaments for a reason. We can flex with these changes and adapt to each new situation to make them into something better.

  We do what we know, and change what we know we need to. Accepting the change, accepting the struggle, knowing it’s not forever, and doing it all with a smile. If you find yourself between a rock and a hard place use your inner Gumby to bend your way out of the middle.

  On that note it is officially October, and October is my happy place. I’m already swooning over the leaves changing and the rain.

  Q: Do you live in an area that showcases seasons? Washington is gorgeous in the fall! 

  

  | 66 Comments Tagged Cats, Coffee, Life, Starbucks

• The Birth of a New B

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on August 4, 2016

  I apologize in advance if this post is over the top, but per usual I need a place to puke my thoughts. To quickly summarize the point of this post all I can say is life.feels.good. That may sound pretty simple, but when you’ve been in a limbo state of life for over a year it’s a bit more complex.

  Hippie dippie vibes need a triangle of Bikenstocks. 

  

  I’m starting to feel like my old self again. The self that was excited to go on adventures, the self that was excited to go for a run, the self that had no desire to fill her body with processed sugar (lol), the self that enjoyed going to work in the morning, the self that felt creative in the kitchen, the self that felt a desire to connect, the true self.

  OK, and a little bit of processed sugar.

  

  I have learned so much about myself the last year, and despite my own personal “struggles” (I hesitate to say struggles because perspective is everything – I had a roof, I had food, I had opportunities, etc..) I know this time of my life was essential for my own personal growth. Settling for less than what we are meant to do in this world can be a slow killer, side effects similar to smoking cigarettes.

  

  Morning commute

  Bottom line – I wasn’t happy, I wasn’t growing, I wasn’t challenged, and I wasn’t living to my potential in any area of my life. I couldn’t decide what to study in school, I felt it was time for a change at work, and I was in need of more social interactions. So I waited, and then eventually I had to say goodbye to my comfort zone.

  I often advocate the idea of “up and quitting” a job that no longer serves you, challenges you, or allows you to grow to search for what really makes you tick, even when society deems this as irresponsible. Perhaps for you the change needed is following your true passion regardless of the fear you’ve built around the ideas.

  Ever notice how the people that are most happy with what they do in this life are those that don’t build walls around the ideas they create in their minds? They think it, believe it, and DO IT.

  

  Be like this bird, break free from the cage. Also – wallpaper goals.

  For me, I knew the time had come where I needed to embrace a huge change and take the leap. I’m not saying what I do now at work is my “passion,” but it’s surly bringing me closer to new and exciting opportunities. It’s challenging my mind in ways I’ve not experienced before.

  In the short three weeks I’ve worked in Seattle I feel like a completely new person. I isolated myself a lot the last year for reasons I really don’t know, but I’ve completely blossomed into a chatty Kathy again. I’m talking to any and everyone that I come in contact with, and it feels natural. I finally WANT to be around people again. I fully attribute this to taking a risk, and jumping into a completely new world.

  

  Evening commute

  I tend to think I’m not “good enough” for some of the things I want in life. This mindset is toxic, it’s sludge that needs to be purged from the walls of my brain. If you think you’re not good enough, then you will manifest a life less than what you’re truly meant to live.

  Truth is anyone is “good enough” for anything they want. Some things take extra work to obtain (I couldn’t just walk into a hospital tomorrow and perform heart surgery no matter how detailed the dream I had about it was), but if it’s truly what you want you’ll make it happen.

  Wash away the toxic thoughts like a river washing away bird poop.

  

  If you feel stuck in life, it’s because it’s time for a change. This is black and white to me now, point blank, very simple if you allow it to be. When a street is blocked off during construction it’s for the safety of other people, this “safety zone” is a temporary thing until the new and improved street is completed. Safety zones are not meant for long term living.

  My safety zone is gone, I’m on a new adventure, and I’m exploring avenues I once thought were out of my spectrum. I’m excited to see what opportunities come my way now that I’ve finally opened the door to shake things up in my world. Take it from me, the longer you stay in a place of unhappiness the longer you’ll be unhappy. You are not a tree, you are meant to move. 

  Q: What are your weekend plans?! I enjoy this question because I finally have “real weekends.”

  

   

  | 60 Comments Tagged Hike, Life, Random, Seattle, Starbucks

• When the “Other Plan” Comes to Fruition

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on July 18, 2016

  You know when things don’t go the way you might have initially hoped and you tell yourself (and others): “it’s OK, life must have another plan for me!” I’m big on this mindset, and truly believe that life works itself out the way it’s supposed to. The hard part is listening to the inner pulls that try to guide us.

  

  I also find that when you really, and I mean “deep in your soul really” let go of whatever kind of control you’re trying to take on life that isn’t working, things start to unfold like a blooming flower.

  

  For example: my meals lately have been very whole foods based. It should come as no surprise that “real food” works best, but once I stopped trying so hard to figure out what foods were bothering my system and really listened to my body, things slowly got better.

  Once I stopped listening to outside opinions and advice from doctors that didn’t align with my beliefs I started to feel better.

  

  Fun Fact: Did you know that if you leave the pit in the avocado, it stays green?

  

  

  I have an insatiable sweet tooth, so I like to make my own desserts.

  I was dealing with food intolerances for the last year, and it wasn’t until I simply let go of the control and the obsession (and stress) of “figuring it all out” that my mind, body, and spirit all started to work together.

  I’m over the moon about all that food stuff, but this post is more about something else. Some of you may remember this post, which was then followed up by this post.

  

  The CliffsNotes version of those two posts are this: I knew in my heart it was time for me to pursue something more with Starbucks. I felt that my current position had expired its purpose, and because this company is paying for my bachelors degree I couldn’t yet pursue outside options. With that said, I started looking into jobs at the corporate office.

  I had one fish bite my line back in April, but it wasn’t the right fit. Instead of sulking about it I stayed positive and knew life had another plan, and it did. Fish number two bit my line about a month ago and today I start my new role in Seattle. Oh, and this role is 10x better than the first bite and I am so thankful that didn’t work.

  

  Every aspect of our life has a purpose. Some things are only meant to last a short while before catalyzing us to our next adventure. I’m notorious for staying in my comfort zone, and while I’m thankful for everything that has come in my time working retail for Starbucks, I’m long overdue for my next chapter.

  I started with this company 3.2 years ago at a time in my life when I needed a place to heal after a tumultuous break up and an unclear life path. The store saved me in so many ways, and leaving there yesterday had me in tears.

  Like, ugly cry tears. 

  

  Yesterdays post work 3.2 miles to commemorate my time at the store. Oh and I got a new Garmin. Mad love – more on that later.

  I think staying in my comfort zone too long, and not accepting that this time of my life was meant to end sparked some of my health problems. I’m a believer of that “woo woo hippie dippie” mind/body/soul connection stuff and when one thing is out of whack the whole bus slows down.

  So what’s the moral to my story? If you quit on life, life will quit on you. When you feel like nothing is going your way, and that life is kicking you while your down, you MUST trust that your other plan will come. Sometimes it takes a month, sometimes it takes two years, sometimes it takes a decade. -OR- perhaps it’s time to take that leap without knowing quite where you will fall. 

  In my case I had to leap, I wouldn’t have made it the last year without some hard core faith. 

  

  This transition is going to be very bittersweet because the first part of my journey with Starbucks came at a time in my life when I felt very lost, and it gave me a purpose for a chunk of time. The store, my coworkers, and a handful of my customers became my family, and I have nothing but positive experiences there which is rare to find.

  It also sprouted a passion for coffee in my soul that I will never outgrown. I’ll no longer be making lattes the way I did, but I plan to bring my passion with me into my next adventure and see where it takes me. Look for me as the annoying corporate worker that forces coffee tastings on her coworkers.

  

  Corporate on the outside, 12yr old on the inside

  My new job requires me to be at a desk, which I don’t love, but my desk will be standing. I will be helping other Starbucks employees from the US and Canada with any inquiries they may have in regards to human resource policies and practices, benefits and pay information, manager questions, etc…another stepping stone onto something more.

  I have no idea what’s ahead with this new journey, but what I do know is that I am more in tune with myself now than I ever have been before. I’m sad to leave this chapter, but ready for a new one. We are wired with sensors that communicate effortlessly, and it’s only when we actively choose to ignore them that we max out our effort meter. Try listening to the signals next time, it’s a whole lot easier

  I promise. 

   No questions today 

  

  | 90 Comments Tagged Coffee, Life, Plant Based, Starbucks, Vegan, Whole Foods

• Goal Getter

  Posted at 5:00 AM by Brittany, on May 7, 2016

  Things around here have been optimistically negative lately, and I’m here to say it’s time to move on. I’ve had a positive spin on all the “more serious” topics that I’ve shared, and it’s quite obvious to all my loyal readers that I’ve found myself in a wobbly life spot. I know that this has been a time of growth for me, and for that I’m thankful.

  Maybe if I just close my eyes everything will turn around on its own.

  

  No such luck. If life worked that way no one would ever appreciate anything. In order to manifest the life I want it’s about time I set some goals. No goals = no direction, no direction = chaos, chaos = sugar binges at 10pm, sugar binges = needing bigger pants, needing bigger pants = spending my traveling fund…and well, you get the idea.

  Or I could just vagabond my way around the world…

  

  If we keep talking about things that we don’t like, the energy from our words will keep us stuck. We must actively choose to speak positively and direct our mind in the direction that we want. This is something I must remind myself of often.

  Here are my current goals for the next few months.

  .

  1. Get my sh*& together with my diet. How I plan to accomplish this: avoiding processed foods/sugar and finding my way back into the kitchen. I feel alive when I’m experimenting with meals.
  

  

  It’s an ugly process trying to break a sugar addiction, and I’ve found myself deeper in the white powder than I’ve ever been before. The only way out is to go cold turkey, and green – lots of green.

  

  2. Get into a solid groove with running, and watch my time improve naturally. How I plan to accomplish this: accept that I’m starting at square one again, fueling well, and being proud of each run. Even the 2 milers.

  

  

  Slow and steady

  3. Finishing strong with school. How I plan to accomplish this: continue doing what I’m doing. I finished my first semester strong and couldn’t be more thrilled. Only one more year.

  

  4. Practice self love. How I plan to accomplish this: STOP TALKING NEGATIVELY. Accept where I am. Move forward. Highlight the positives. Chop off my hair. Run.

  

  5. Grow my own food. How I plan to accomplish this: Self explanatory, but by starting small. I have been growing lettuce in my kitchen window and it’s flourishing!

  

  5. Put my energy into helping others instead of dwelling on stupid things. How I plan to accomplish this: volunteering, staying positive at work, family time, and by finding my inner zen. When we take the focus off ourselves, life becomes much easier.

  

  6. Blog more consistently. How I plan to accomplish this: CONTINUE TO go on EPIC ADVENTURES that are blog worthy. This space is a huge part of my life, and I’ve been somewhat absent lately, but I want to get back into a blog flow.

  

  

  Latest mountain adventure.

  

  These goals are realistic and attainable, which is a great place to start.

  Q: What’s one of your current goals? Eyes on the prize!

  

  | 63 Comments Tagged Blog, Life, Running, School

• Discovering New Identities

  Posted at 7:05 AM by Brittany, on April 15, 2016

  Blogging has always been a fantastic outlet for me to share my self proclaimed creativity through adventures, food, coffee, and whatever else life throws my way. It’s been a huge part of my life for five years now (wow), but I’d be lying if I said it’s been easy lately.

  

  I’ve been sharing my love for vegan food, coffee, and running for most of those five years, and all of these things have given me a solid chunk of personal identity. I’ve been struggling with health issues lately that have caused me to give up coffee, take a vegan vacation, and step back from running – aka 90% of what I blog about/talk about/dream about/live about.

  To say I feel like my identity has been stripped would be an understatement.

  

  I’m still running…sometimes, I still eat predominately plant based…most of the time, and I still tried to drink coffee…until finally accepting that I just can’t. I still don’t know the underlying cause behind my symptoms right now (an ongoing process that’s been going on for years) but I’m determined to figure it out.

  I’m beginning to suspect that stress may be a large part of why I’ve been having issues lately. I’ve never thought much about it, but I do tend to let my mind take me down the rabbit hole if I’m not careful. I hereby declare that I will put my energy into things that calm me, and stop focusing on things that don’t.

  

  I’m not writing this seeking sympathy, but to simply share that I’ve felt like a blogging zombie lately. Although I’ve still had great adventures to share, I feel like I’m in a limbo right now where I’m trying to fit a square block into a hole for a circle block. I’m also a sucker for transparency, and I don’t blog for a job – I blog for connections.

  Plus I feel like getting this off my chest (as it’s been on my mind for a while) will help me feel more authentic with my blogging again. 

  I know this isn’t forever, and I’ll find my way back onto the wagon soon enough, but for now I’m going to use this as an opportunity to add new things to my list of identity characteristics. I’ll still be sharing any runs I go on, plant based foods I eat, but coffee and I are on a solid break until I start feeling better.

  Thankfully my mountain adventures are still going strong.

  

  I’m always talking about how life is fluid and changes whether we are ready or not, and while it feels like my adventure has had constant twists the last couple years, I still have complete control over how I will use these twists to build an epic life full of experience and multiple identities.

  Not to be confused with multiple personalities. 

  Overall life is good, and I’m extremely blessed. I’m off to Portland tomorrow to run this race and I’m excited to get away for the weekend. I’m not stressing about the run despite the fact that I haven’t had my heart rate out of the resting zone much the last couple weeks. I’ve always said running is more mental anyway so I’ll let you know if my theory is true.

  Wish me luck, and pray I don’t pass out on the side of the road. 

  Q: What are your plans for this weekend?

  

  | 100 Comments Tagged Explore, Hike, Life, Plant Based, Portland, Running, Vegan

• Balanced Isolation Leads to Peaceful Understanding

  Posted at 11:00 AM by Brittany, on March 15, 2016

  I want to hug each and every one of you that commented on my last post. It’s sometimes scary opening your heart and soul to a sea of people, but I am thankful that I have never once received a negative comment on my blog. The community we have built here is one I am happy to be apart of, even when I don’t blog as often.

  I adore having this space to share bits of my life.

  

  I want to say thank you for all the kind words shared the last handful of years, and while my blog is just a small speck in a sea of whales I appreciate anyone that stops by. I read and reply to EACH comment, so if you ever ask a question please be sure to check back in for my reply!

  I don’t have the fancy capabilities to have my reply sent to your email, so we just have to put in a little work to engage in conversation in my neck of the woods.

  

  SPEAKING OF woods, I took myself on a solo hike last Tuesday and it was one for the books. A complete spirit, mind, and body renewal.

  I finished my set of classes about a week and a half ago and I tried to get a small bit of exploring in before starting back up again today. My first round went smashingly well, and it was nice to take a non school related book with me into the mountains.

  

  I’m currently reading Amy Poehler’s book “Yes Please” and it’s both entertaining and inspirational all wrapped into one. I was fortunate enough to have this spot of the trail to myself for a while, until a fellow reader came and sat down. It was like our own unannounced book club. Reading different books. Not speaking.

  Just go with it. 

  To balance out this solo adventure I made plans to hangout with a friend a few days later. Like a real life human friend, but first I had to give some love to my main man.

  

  Since I’m trying to push myself out of the isolated bubble human interaction is necessary, but the allure of the silence while walking with animals is one I will never outgrow. There is something special about not being alone, but also not speaking.

  Does that make sense? I’m sounding crazier by the minute.

  

  

  I had quite the adventure once reunited with my friend. At lunch I was served beef after ordering a vegan burger, and then I was blindfolded by a towel while laying on a stingy recliner at a $25 foot massage/full body abuse chamber. The beauty of being balanced is that moments like this are easy to laugh at. I thank my solo hike.

  I also thank my running, even when inconsistent.

  

  Mistakes happen, and why people get worked up when they do is beyond me. I will never be the person to demand a free meal from a mistake, or not leave a tip because my “masseuse” was training for his next cage fight on my arm.

  So what’s today’s takeaway?

  Before letting your own mental distress hurt someone else, put yourself in their shoes. Have you never messed something up before? Have you never upset another person? Have you done something to be given the right to treat people rudely because you feel you’re entitled to? We are all in this world together and should all be treated the same.

  

  In all honesty though I won’t be adventuring to a cheap sketchy massage place again anytime soon, but the memory is one I will laugh at for years.

  Q: Allergy concerns aside, take a moment to think about how you would react if your food order was messed up. Is it really worth it to cause a big scene? My waiter was extremely embarrassed and apologetic, had he been rude perhaps it would have been a different story, but we each treated each other with respect and called it a day. 

  

  | 79 Comments Tagged Adventure, Hiking, Life, Running, Solo Hike, Vegan

• The Time Has Come the Walrus Said

  Posted at 10:30 AM by Brittany, on March 4, 2016

  …to talk of many things.

  The last time I started a post with these words I shared with the world my thoughts, feelings, and emotions after going through a breakup. No, let me rephrase – after going through the breakup. You know, the one that shakes you so hard to the core that your life will never be the same.

  Grab a cup of coffee, this is going to be one of those posts.

  

  Coffee tastings inspire me to be creative.

  I’m thankful for this time in my life, and despite going through the typical hardships that come with a split it was in this time that I discovered how to be on my own. I had a sense of peace about the situation that I will never forget.

  I will also never forget how this relationship robbed me of my ability to be vulnerable. I made it my mission to be stronger alone and never again let someone make me loose all desire to have a mind of my own. It took me three years to realize I had accomplished this mission, but had then continued running with it further than I needed to.

  

  For the last few months I’ve been in an odd place. I have alluded to a void that I have been trying to fill in other posts, but they all come back to the fact that I feel out of balance mentally, physically, and spiritually.

  I’ve been trying to figure out the root cause of a myriad of health issues the last nine months which has put me into a bit of a funk. I don’t believe in a quick fix, and am not interested in drugs, pills, or other cover-ups which has made this process a bit long. I am a big believer that most anything can be fixed through food.

  

  I’ve developed a handful of food intolerance’s the last year that suddenly gave me the desire to try adding animal products back into my diet. Long story short this hasn’t been working and always leaves me mentally distraught. I regret nothing, and don’t feel the need to expand on this anymore. I’m only sharing because I believe in being as transparent as possible.

  I still haven’t figured everything out, but what I have figured out is that after being fearful of what I ate for months, stuffing any emotions that I felt because: “I can do this on my own, no one wants to hear my problems” and eventually spiraling into a: “I don’t care anymore I’m going to eat anything and everything” what I need is quite simple. What I need is other people.

  

  In all honesty it’s been difficult finding other people that enjoy the things I enjoy. I’m an odd bird that enjoys eating plants, running streets, climbing mountains, and exploring new places. You’d think living in the PNW this would be simple, but I’m surrounded by sedentary people. In order for me to find a circle of people I genuinely enjoy being around I will have to step outside of my comfort zone.

  What started as a necessary journey of figuring out how to be on my own, has transitioned me into a deep hole of isolation from other people. I don’t know how to talk to people about my feelings because I’ve never felt validated. I don’t regret taking the time to be alone, but I’m starting to realize that perhaps the void I’m seeking to fill is learning how to be vulnerable again, and knowing that it’s OK to fall down.

  Human beings thrive on companionship and while it’s essential to know how to stand on your own, I now realize it’s just as essential to lean on each other when you’re in need of an ear to listen, an arm to hug, or a partner to run with.

  

  Early morning solo runs require mace.

  I don’t typically enjoy posting things like this, but to bring this topic of leaning on others full circle I want anyone else out there to know that if you’re feeling similar things that you’re not alone. We all go though moments in life that cause us to reflect, and it’s what we do with the thoughts and emotions that matters. You can either sink with the waves or swim to the shore.

  Last week I set out for a bike ride only to discover I had a flat tire. Drat. I knew how to take the wheel off my bike thanks to watching my dad do it many times. The problem didn’t arise until I returned home from REI to discover I couldn’t figure out how to get the wheel back onto the gears. I let the bike sit in my garage for a few days before deciding to take the bike back (stuffing it awkwardly in my car because I didn’t want to have to ask for help) and let them reattach my wheel.

  

  I knew in the back of my mind that I had a neighbor familiar with bikes, but I had never spoken to him. I didn’t want to ask him for help because it made me uncomfortable. Just as I was going to attempt getting my car filthy I got a burst of confidence and decided to ask him for help.

  He put the tire back on my bike in less than a minute.

  It’s in these moments of discomfort that we grow. I’m uncomfortable asking other people for help, but it’s time for me to get over that. It’s OK to need other people. It’s OK to need help, and more importantly it’s OK to be vulnerable. No one is created with bionic emotions, so it’s essential for us to embrace them all. Besides, helping others gives me a great excuse to bake cookies and share coffee as a thank you.

  

  The best part of not knowing my neighbors is that they’d have no idea my cookies were vegan. Classic chocolate chip cookies to highlights the beautiful cocoa notes of the sweet and full bodied Caffe Verona.

  Writing this post feels good, like a small weight has been lifted. Overall things in my world are great – I’m an optimist, and stubborn as hell so I see every experience as an opportunity to grow into a bigger and better you. I’m ready to put this experience into my learning jar and move forward.

  So who wants to come venture into the mountains with me? I suppose not every hike needs to be solo. 😉

  No questions today, just feel free to share thoughts, experiences, and emotions.

  

  | 94 Comments Tagged Biking, Emotions, Friendship, Life, Running

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• Contact: blissfulbritt@yahoo.com

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