You know you’re in good company when you visit someone that puts ” visit Amish country” on the to do list. Before last week I had no experience with the Amish way of life, other than the extremely scripted “reality” TV show “Breaking Amish,” which I admittedly have been sucked into watching more than once.
PC Meghan, a true horse and buggy.
It seemed to me the Amish lived a very simple life, similar to the idea of living off the grid which I love. While this is true for most Amish that abstain from things like electricity and cars, I also discovered things I didn’t know.
Meghan and I found ourselves smack in the heart of tourist Amish country, where despite the beards, dresses, and fancy hats, the Amish people were no different when it came to making money. Whatever it takes to make that dollar, even if it’s not completely ethical (in my eyes.)
My excitement quickly turned to fear when I saw a 3000 lb horse with sad eyes kicking ferociously to get out of his 10×10 pen, and when I saw an obese pig (I pray it was just preggo) having stomach convulsions. I suddenly felt like I was in a horror movie and my stomach sank to my toes. We spent ZERO pennies at this spot.
We quickly moved on to check out the bakeries, because the words “homemade” and “fresh baked” spoke to my sugar loving soul louder than a morning rooster. I also got excited to check out the famous cheese factory, and I don’t even eat cheese.
Not only were they “not making cheese today,” the cheeses has added microbial fillers and colors. Um, what? Worse than this were the “homemade” baked goods.”
Cue the Psycho music.
Well shoot, apparently my homemade goods have been missing some key ingredients like partially hydrogenated oils, polysorbate 60 (wtf?!), and artificial flavors.
It wasn’t all scary though, the autumnal displays had my heart singing like a summer canary. Pumpkins, mums, and wagon wheels OH MY!
I also found my soulmate at one of the antique shops, but he refused to come home with me after I told him I would NOT be filling his belly with Amish made cookies.
All this needs is the word “my” after the word “steal.”
After spending one too many hours trying to find a ray of hope, my hanger became unmanageable. With no explanation other than the magical white squirrels waving their tails again, I found a place to eat that was FRESH and delicious.
Like a water mirage in the middle of the desert.
Cute decor too!
I hoovered a burrito quicker than a Dyson vacuum
The ONLY item in all of Amish land, with no crazy oils or unpronounceable ingredients.
Moral of my story is this: things aren’t always what they seem. I pray this is the case with the animals I saw at stop number one. ¡Ay, qué horror!
I’d like to add that I am in no way “judging” the uncomplicated way of life for the Amish, and if it weren’t for the stories and sights of the living conditions for the animals I would be all about that life. I’m simply sharing my experience. 🙂
Q: Have you ever been to Amish country? Tell me I’m not the only one that has shamelessly watched “Breaking Amish.”