**I struggled with hitting publish on this post. I feel vulnerable putting my thoughts out there, but perhaps being vulnerable can be good.**
Initially I wanted to blog about the amazing cookies I baked the other day, but somewhere over the course of the night my mind decided otherwise. I have been thinking about a post like this for a little over a week now, but was unsure whether I should write it. I like to keep my blog positive and steer clear of any “attention seeking” posts. Not that I think there’s anything wrong with others blogging about personal struggles, but I’ve just never done it. Maybe it’s time to give it a try.
Given that this is “my” blog and for those of you that read my blog regularly, I will probably still try to keep this post upbeat and incorporate any kind of humor I can to keep my voice prevalent throughout the post. Fact of the matter is that we’re all human and shit happens. It’s whether or not you embrace the smelly shit and wipe it off your shoe, or continue to walk with it for far too long. If wordy posts aren’t for you, feel free to skip this one. I’ll be back with food and running updates in my next post.
Here’s the deal: My life looks like this right now..
Normally I love roller-coasters, the bigger the better, but not when it comes to my life. This is the only roller-coaster you will hear me ask to get off of. I am the one annoying child in the corner crying and raising my hand to get off becasue I have peed my pants out of fear. This is normal thought right? It’s times like these that make us grow and figure out who we are as individuals? If so I am ready to start the growth..seriously..I’m ready.
My personal life is a wreck. The details of this will not be shared at this time. All I will say is that EACH day is different. Each day is new, and each day is completely controlled by me. I can choose to be a depressed slug and lay in bed all day, or I can choose to get off my ass and go find something to do. I have to admit I have done much more of the former these past 2 weeks. My sleep is off, my appetite is off, my personality is off, and my energy is off. Let me just say I am NOT looking for sympathy with this, I just need to get it OUT of my brain and “vent” so to speak. Who know’s maybe someone else can read this and relate. My professional life is a bit of a wreck to..welcome to the party. No where to go but up right?
You all remember these guys right? This was a math related problem that I loved because it was easy. That’s my problem..I like things that are easy. Chasing after the easy way never gets you anywhere let me just say that right now. Anyway, allow me explain my use of the diagram.
As some of you know, I recently quit my job to focus on school. Well not long after my last day of work, I dropped the class I was taking because I was getting too stressed out. I KNOW I KNOW somebody slap me. Here’s the deal though, I had already taken this class..and I got a REALLY good grade. A 3.6 to be exact, that would be a 91%..in Microbiology. I hate science..so this is a big deal. It’s not that I don’t want to be a dental hygienist..in fact I REALLY want to be one..but I also REALLY want to be a train conductor for small children in the local mall.
I’m kidding, I don’t want to be a conductor..I only said that because I actually saw this in the mall a few days ago. It was really weird. My point being..there are A LOT of things that I feel like I REALLY want to do with my life. This is where the diagram comes into play..I have section A being realistic life dreams that will take care of me, and I have section B being other ideas floating around my mind that could be fun. The middle section is where I have a problem.
- A. Dental Hygiene
- B. Nutrition, Dental Assisting, ANY medical profession, Bachelors in Psychology (what would I do with this? I figure everyone has a brain..so psych comes around in any job) Bachelors in ANYTHING, join the circus.
- Middle. So traditionally this is the section where the common qualities of both A and B come to play. I’m going to break the rules a bit and simply put one phrase into the middle. “ENDLESS OPPORTUNITY.” Both sections have some kind of promise.
THAT’s the problem. I am unemployed, I am not in school, and I literally have the world at my fingertips..but I have no idea what I want to grab. I’m literally in a life slump where I have NO idea what I am doing. Anyone else stuck in this slump? Let’s make taco’s and have a fiesta while we pull ourselves out. The bottom line is I need to start thinking about my life. I need to think about what I want to do, who I want around, and where I want to go. I have been struggling with this process for quite some time now, and I have to thank my mom, my dad, and Manfriend for continuing to tell me things will be OK. Thank god for family.
This is where I start the conclusion of the post. I have to stop whining about being “lost.” I have good friends, good family, great cats, and a roof over my head with a TON of delicious food. I am alive, I am growing, I am learning, and I am becoming a new person. 2 weeks away from “real” life gives you A LOT of time to think and reflect on what you do and don’t want. I don’t want to be without for too much longer. What I do know is that I need to be completely sure before I make any decisions. For now, I will continue to figure things out.
Q(s):
- Who actually read this beast?
- How long did it take you to figure out what you wanted to do?
Amazing amazing post! Honestly — I STILL don’t know what I want to do (haha)…life is like a giant roller coaster!
As the first comment on this post..you set my mind up for success on the comments to follow!! Thank you for sharing your love!
Read the whole thing! And I can totally relate to you…though I am in school and work on campus. But, I graduate in December and have been looking into jobs but nothing sounds fun or appealing. I don’t really want to find a job I don’t like, but the thought of not having income is scary, too! Ahhh life. Hope things start looking up! Keep smiling
I agree about the income! I have a cushion and still live at home, but I almost wonder if that is a hindrance for me to get a move on! Either way I know things should look up soon! Good luck on the job find!
I read the post, hon. I’m going to steer clear of wise and pithy cuz I’m plum out (and at most moments, my life is in complete and utter chaos – yes, thanks to my own doing, or undoing), but the weird thing is, this kind of stuff DOES get figured out. And there’s no need to settle on one thing to Be. Do the dental deal for a while until something else revs you up, do that – and so on. Life is an adventure! PS I have no idea what I want to do or be – and I’m 46.
I love you. Plain and simple. While you tried to steer clear of the wisdom, you did just that in the simplest and most appreciated way. Thank you for sharing, and I find comfort knowing that I can ALWAYS change my mind!
Love you, too, girl. You make me smile with every one of your posts. I have NO DOUBT you are going to rock your 30s, 40s and beyond!
You can do it! Just keep moving forward.
I don’t know what I want to do but at the moment, my goal is to get my Bachelor’s and then figure it out from there.I have too many interests that I have a hard time focusing on just one. :/ Staying motivated is probably the best thing to do and it sounds like you have goals so you’re already on the right track!
Your goal sounds great. I love the idea of getting a Bachelor’s, which is something I desire. The problem is figuring out in what! HA! Thank you for your comment, I miss your posts!
wow just wow. I can so relate to this. the girl who loves rollar coasters like myself is feeling super vulnerable as well. i have so much in front of me but have no idea what to grab, kind of like you. the best advice i have been given is that live for each day, let each day unfold and from there it will hit you. I feel lost as well but the most we can do is embrace it. i know that may not be that oh man such great advice moment but hey, just know you are not alone. I am always an email away!
I love the advice you have, you’re right..each day should be lived and unfolded on its own. Focusing on the past, or the future will blurr the day that I have in front of me! Thank you for the support!
Britt I hear ya.
About a year ago I was the same way. I was overwhelmed with options. Sometimes being able to access all of life’s opportunities can be challenging in its own way because there is so much to choose from and we are afraid of the “wrong” choice. So first of all, there is no wrong choice. If you head down one path you can ALWAYS switch. Remember that.
Second, I started by asking my friends who I felt were “successful” how they made their decisions to pursue their careers. The answers surprised me. Almost none of them knew. The ones who did were so passionate you could see the love for their job in their eyes. I decided I wanted to be that person, and that there was no rush.
Finally I talked to the most successful people I know – my parents. I found out my Dad didn’t settle into his “career” until he was 28, and my Mom never regretted doing what she did – but always wished for something else.
Sorry this is so long but in the end I decided to give things a try. I took an advanced first aid course cause I’m interested in medicine. I started a second job at a hotel because event planning and hotel management interest me. And I made lists of what I didn’t like. Now I’m down to two or three career options from the bajillion I had a year ago – I don’t know which one I will choose but who says I can’t do them all?
Forget convention and remember the important thing is to love your life – however it is that happens.
<3
It’s funny you say this about your dad. My dad was exactly the same way. He didn’t start his ending career path until 28. Now he is a successful doctor and is doing very well for himself. I love the idea of checking out the different options like first aid and the hotel. Thank you for your comment!
Brittany, there are people who still are lost, and somehow, they still keep going on!
Touche!! Somehow I am still moving forward, despite feeling a bit lost at times! Thank you!
Ahh, I’ve totally been there. It’s so overwhelming. What helps me is to focus on the small baby steps (the big picture is too overwhelming) and do something, anything “different” to change up your mindset and feel less in a slump….volunteer somewhere interesting, find a totally out-of-your-box hobby, don’t be afraid to make mistakes (i was so afraid to make mistakes or the wrong choice that i wouldn’t get started), and be patient because eventually you’ll figure it out….I swear!
You and I are very much alike with this “big picture” stuff. I HATE the big picture!! It is the one thing that stresses me out the most! I definitely like the idea of baby steps. Thank you for this comment!
Oh Britt, thanks for your transparency here. If you need/want to talk in detail about any of this, shoot me an email. I’m happy to talk it out or just listen. Whatever you need. And you know, grown up life may not look the way you expected it to before. I dropped out of grad school after my first year and really worried that I would regret that decision someday. It has been 3 years since then and I am still so grateful that I quit. It’s crazy ’cause I always thought that I would have a career in counseling and yet instead I nanny part time (which I LOVE) and have the rest of my time available to volunteer with teens. And while I’m not a certified counselor, I have lots of education/book knowledge on therapy so I can help up to a point and I always know when I’m out of my element and need to refer someone. So instead of spending 4 years in grad school, I’ve been able to spend the last few years available to the kids around me. To mentor and love them. I don’t regret my decision to leave grad school one bit. I love that I get to use my gifts to help teens NOW.
Anyway, not knowing exactly where you’re going is okay. I was there for a while. I knew the general idea of what I wanted to do (work with teens), but it took me a while to figure out exactly how I wanted to do that. 
Rach you are so sweet and I adore you. Thank you for this comment, and for your willingness to “be there.” I appreciate the love and warmth behind your comments and they really do help!! I loved reading your story, and it helps to know I’m not all that much off track!
I read your whole post, love, and I’m glad you decided to post it because I’m sure a lot of people can relate – I know I definitely can. I mean, sure it’s great to be upbeat and happy, but we’re human and we’re allowed to have crappy days/weeks. I’ve struggled A LOT with trying to figure out what I want to do in life, and to be honest I’m still not sure. I graduated with a BA in psych and it’s like… now what. Part of me wants to go back to school, but another part of me doesn’t. All I really know is that I want to help people, but I’m not entirely sure how to go about doing that… it seems like all of the endless opportunities out there just complicate things a lot more. Sigh. Sorry I couldn’t offer much advice, but I’m still trying to figure it out for myself…
Your advice was perfect. Thank you for sharing. A lot of us are in the same boat and that alone is enough motivation to keep moving. Knowing we are not alone is amazing! Thank you for the comment! I love you!
I wish we could have a 3 hour long convo over froyo about this. Some people know exactly what they want out of life from the second they graduate high school and others need time to explore and figure out what it is they truly feel passionate about, and both are a-OK. Like some other commenters mentioned, don’t be afraid to just go with your gut and try something out whether thats to stick with dental hygiene or go another route because you can ALWAYS change things if they don’t seem right. Your 20s are about not knowing wtf you want out of life, and you just gotta roll with it.
Girlfrannn, you are a saint to have mentioned 3hrs worth of girl talk and froyo!! UGH I WISH!! I really am starting to embrace the fact that being young is about figuring out myself! Thank you for the comment!
I read your whole post
I’m glad you shared what’s been going on.. sometimes it’s best to just get it out. I always feel that writing helps. You asked how long did it take for us to figure out what we wanted to do, and for me, I just realized this past summer… and I’ve been out of school for 2 years now and just graduated with my Masters this past May. All during school I was so set on one thing, until I realized “maybe it’s not for me”.. I graduated with a BA in Journalism, and while I love writing, it’s a very tough field to get into. I went through the same thing you’re going through (everyone does I’m sure) when I was unemployed when I first graduated I was so depressed, I didn’t know what to do with myself and felt that I was just wasting time. Everyday my Mom would tell me to apply for jobs, but after a month or two of not hearing anything it was a big downer. I feel the 20′s are a tough and very tough time for everyone, it’s like we’re in that transition between being a “kid” and “adult”. For me to get through this I read some self help books actually, Joel Oosten writes really nice stuff, and idk it kinda helped me feel better with some things lol I also talked to my teachers/old professors and got involved in organizations at my school to feel I was doing something. Sorry this is so long lol but just have a peace at mind that I’m still figuring things out too 
First of all, congrats again on your Masters..that is an amazing accomplishment! I hear you on the “tough field to get into.” That’s what I struggle with about dental. I try and try and just continue to fall short. I love the idea of the books, I actually have a date with the library today to get my mind onto something other than this so I will have to check out some of Joel’s stuff..thank you for your comment!
I read this although I admit I didn’t read all of the comments
I appreciate your honesty and realness and I can relate. When I was in school I worked hard to graduate in 3 years then I realized I have no idea what I’m doing and it took 4 months to get a job. I don’t feel qualified to give any advice because I’m still trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do!
It appears we are ALL trying to figure out what we are “supposed” to do! I appreciate the comment and while it seems it takes time to figure things out, I guess it always does work out in the end!
My friend I reckon you can’t stop life being a roller coaster but that is what makes it so fun and intense but also scary sometimes – you Abe an incredibly positive attitude and that will get you through to doing what you want when you decide
Hugs
Uru
You are right about that, wonderful way to put the roller coaster analogy. Thank you for this comment, and thank you for keeping positive vibes!
I can really relate to this. I don’t know where I want to go after this year. I could see myself going in about 1000 different directions…nutrition…drug studies…the possibilities are endless. Not that I’m complaining. I just would like to have some direction…I’m not 30 and settled by any means but I’m not ready to give up my childhood either.
I hear ya, it’s almost a curse having so many options! I often wish I had one or two paths to choose from, then it would be so much easier!! Don’t give anything up until you are ready! Thank you for the comment!
Girl, you are NOT alone in this!!! I question myself every single day if I am taking the right path, doing the right thing, stressing, etc. I don’t even know what I am going to do once I graduate because there are SO many things I want to do. I think the best thing is to try and just listen to your heart and think about what you TRULY want to do. Don’t only go for the “safe route” which I thought I was going to do my entire life. All I cared about was making a ton of money, but now, I just want to be happy so I’m hoping life will lead me that way. I think you will end up where you are supposed to be eventually
You are completely right, as wise people often tell me..”do what you love and the money will follow!” Thank you for the comment, we are all in this together!
I love that you posted this. It’s shows strength, character and YOU…. we are not always upbeat/happy or KNOW where we are going/what we are doing with our lives. It’s perfectly natural…. and it WILL work out in the end. I have been through similar phases too, my love, and it’s all so scary and overwhelming at the time – think of this as a transition period – one for learning and discovering about yourself (and it’s fine to lie in bed and cry for days at a time, seriously! Been there too)
HUGS! And I am sending you lovely positive, encouraging vibes…. I’m so proud of you for posting this… it really does show that you are in tune with yourself…. venting is SO GOOD xx
Transition period..I love that idea. Thank you thank you for this comment, you had the perfect words to share. I love you to the moon and appreciate your friendship so very much!
Britt you are SO amazing. Not only for opening up about these stresses in your life, but how you maintain such a positive attitude in the midst of it all. I admire you SO much and I just know that whatever path God has in store for you, it’s gonna be EPIC. You are so talented, smart, and just all around awesome and deserve only the best!!!
I’m sending SO many hugs your way, and if you ever need to talk, don’t hesitate to shoot me an email! <3
Thank you for the hugs and the willingness to chat!! You are a gem and I adore you!! I am keeping an open mind and an open heart to be guided onto whatever path is meant for me!
I feel the exact same way before I share something personal on my blog…so vulnerable and scared. But your post was wonderful (as are you), and you seem to be approaching this intersection with clear thoughts and good intentions so amazing opportunties are just around the corner (no matter which stree sign you choose to follow).
Thank you! I have certainly found that a lot of people are living with similar fears and vulnerability! If only we could all meet and have a party for real!
With wine : ) Count me in!
Girlfriend, when I read this article earlier from my mobile, in addition to it breaking my heart for your sadness and in addition to it making me happy that you didn’t divulge that you’ve become bulimic… I exclaimed, “Ughhh!!!!” Why??? Been there. Done that. I’m 30 and almost 31 and therefore ancient! But I am a success, and I flaunt that with my girly girl ruffle skirts from LuluLemon. Thus, I shall confidently offer my counsel to you. Approach your future with a peaceful albeit aggressive mind. The sooner the better. I worked like an unhappy roach for a long time before I knew my calling… which is currently writing and owning a gorgeous dog walking business. Might not sound glamourous… but check my bank statements, and then check my closet.
SO, that said, I want you to work for a dog walker. Walking dogs allows you the time and space to THINK… whilst earning money. You can earn just as, and probably MUCH MORE than you did working for TJ’s… $17 an hour +.
And I love you!
And that is all, for now.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
FIRST OF ALL..you are far from ancient. Don’t you dare say that phrase around here again! You are a sexy sassy biatch and have come into your most amazing part of life. It’s people like you that I admire and look to for inspiration! I AM LOVING that you have started your business and LOVVVING that it’s doing so well!! You are living your dream, and that is EXACTLY what you should be doing! I think dog walking is an amazing dream and you are doing whatever it takes to get what you want out of life. THANK you for the comment, as always I LOVED it and I LOVE YOU!
LOVE the feedback that you’re getting at this article.
You are so ADORED!!!
Not knowing what you want to do is one of the scariest parts of growing up. Within the past few years, I decided that “pursuing your passion” is a lie perpetuated by the stereotypical American Dream and I don’t like it.
For me, my job exists to support my extracurricular activities – I define myself by how I spend my free time, not by how I earn a living. I want to work JUST hard enough to support those endeavors and not a single lick harder.
I really hope you’re able to find something that works for you. I think that writing about it helps
I hear you on “pursuing your passion.” I have actually be thinking more about finding a career that does in fact support my lifestyle OUTSIDE OF work just as you stated. I loved this comment and I am so thankful that you posted this!
I think we’re all pretty much in the same boat. EVERY DAY I decide to do something different, think that I am staying in Ontario for the next 5 years, and then 30min later I think moving to BC is the greatest idea ever – we’re 20-somethings and I’m pretty sure we all don’t know what we really want to do with our lives – HOW can we at this point in time anyways?
Read this, I think it sums us all up to a T:
http://friesorsalad.tumblr.com/post/33712866089/twenty-something-ways-to-know-youre-twenty-something
In the end though, you WILL figure it out, regardless of how long it takes or how confusing it might be. Just take some time to think about it…or even not think about it and just live your life day by day and see what happens. Like my Mama always says – time fixes any problem
And everything else that’s going on in your life (not career related), I am sure soon everything with that will be okay too.. you are strong and get through anything 
Don’t worry.
Just wrote a book as a comment, my bad. XOXOXOXOXOXOXXO
ps, were totally making tacos come 2013 when we have roadies.. we’ll figure out lives out over food
Loved the book comment, those are my favorite. Your moms advice is amazing and so true..and while I KNOW it’s true it always sucks to be in the middle of the slow moving time. I know I will look back and laugh, but getting there is the stuggle! That link you shared was perfect..so true! Thank you for commenting, I LOVE YOU!
Thank you for writing this and being so honest. I thought that I was alone in this. Obviously, many people are going through what you are going through. I’m with you. I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I am not in school and I am unemployed. I got a bachelor’s in Elementary Education but decided that I didn’t want to work with kids. Now, I have all of these ideas of what I want to do…nutrition, photography, life coach, etc. Nothing sounds appealing when I look at job listings. Don’t take a job if it doesn’t interest you. Only do this if you really need money or if it is a stepping stone to get to a better job. People will tell you to stick to one thing. I don’t like that advice. I want to do it all. I am in the process of job shadowing and career interviews. That may help you figure out what you want to do. You can always have a job in one of your passions and then do your other passions in your free time. Don’t stress out about it and don’t compare yourself to other people. Most of my friends have houses, kids, master’s degrees, and careers. I think someone else said this, but volunteer. Volunteer in something that sounds interesting. It may lead to a job or a career path. Good luck! Stay true to yourself and know that you can always quit a job or start on a new path.
As you may have discovered from reading any of the comments..there are SO many of us in this boat! I want to do it all too! I think comparing myself to others is where I am getting into trouble, I need to definitely stop doing that. Thank you for the comment and here’s to finding our path!
Read this whole thing, and I absolutely love and admire your honesty. You are stronger than you think. I mean you dropped everything in hopes of figuring out exactly what it is that you want to do. I don’t doubt for a second that everything won’t fall into place for you. There are so many people out there who are in the same exact position as you. Please don’t feel a lone, because you have support of so many people. Just continue to smile, and know things will work out exactly how they are suppose too <3
Thank you thank you, your comment is so very appreciated!! I am holding on and staying hopeful for the future!
You are definitely not alone on this Britt! There are so many times when I wonder where I am going with life and whether I have made the right choices! As for careers, I have dabbled in so many fields only to come to the realization that ultimately I need to do what I am passionate about: nutrition! Next week is actually my last week at my current job as I am finally biting the bullet and set up a consulting business of my own! It’s scary as hell but if all goes well, I know it will be so worth it!
I am so excited for what’s coming your way!! Thank you for this comment, it is so appreciated! I have come to learn that sometimes the scariest paths are the most rewarding!!
Hi Britt, silent reader
You are definitely not alone (as most other people have already said.) I think it’s less common for people to know exactly what they want to do with their lives so young. It seems like we get pressured to choose a career path still so young – in school – at a time when we are still even learning who we are as people, what our strengths and weaknesses are, what our likes and dislikes are. it’s no wonder so many people change careers many times in their lifetime.
I remember in the end of high school, even though I’d already been accepted into my place of choice, and the world seemed at my feet – having a huge breakdown/panic attack to end all panic attacks – because everything was changing. School was all I’d known for my whole life. It was a constant. I was a student. Sure I was going to be this or that, but I knew what I was right now – a student, studying, dancing, going to be this or that, etc. Now, nothing was certain. The whole world lay ahead of me. Everyone was going their separate ways. I was faced with more choices in a single day every day, than I had in most of my life before that (especially since I was in a very controlling home environment where thinking for yourself was discouraged.)
The only advice I could really give would be keep an open mind. Try everything that comes your way – and be gentle on yourself. Getting overwhelmed and then beginning to cancel/give up things is another trap I too fall into, and the more you beat yourself up about what you didn’t go to, and pressure yourself to go next time or go to the next thing, the harder it gets!
Just remember there isn’t failure in life. It all counts for something, even the times you fall flat in your face, because hey, you learnt something from that, didn’t you? And it’s going towards your beliefs, knowledge, experience, strength…
How are you for routines in your everyday life? Maybe amongst all the uncertainty, establishing firmer personal routines might help you feel a bit more stable until the other things settle down? You might not know if you will have a job tomorrow, or if this course is the thing you should be doing – but at least you know you are doing x and y at x and y times. That sounds a bit too simple really… but I know that it gives me something to hang on to.
And set tiny goals. I think another huge shift we have to get used to in this time of growing up (which goes all the way from adolescence right through past 30 I believe!) is to get used to seeing the bigger picture, sure, but being more concerned about the bits of it that we are working on right now. Our whole life goals ARE huge – whole lives are huge. They can seem overwhelming, impossible, when we look forward from where we are right now and try to think of how we are going to go from this to that. But small goals like “This year I would like to learn how to ice skate, complete these subjects with the best marks that I can, volunteer once a week in a NFP that aligns with my bigger picture goals for experience, and train for a half marathon.” can totally work. They are contributing to the bigger picture – but probably not nearly as overwhelming!
Hope that makes any sense… hang on okay. And thank you for being real.
Thank you! I love the idea of finding daily routines, I think this would be a great help in not feeling bored or alone. I love the tiny goals too..such great advice and I will need to put some of these to use! Thank you!
I have two children closer to your age.. what has worked for my eldest.. now in her 4th year of Business.. is that she didn’t know what she wanted to do either. I told her to just keep going and hang in there. Just this past April, she hit on it.. she wants to enter Petroleum Land Management. My son is in general Economics studies and has no idea what he wants to do. He’s going to keep taking cool, interesting options until something “clicks”. I do know my cello instructor followed his passion and ended up in music with no marketable skills for an actual job, not such a great idea. I wanted to be a doctor
but didn’t have the sciences so I became a teacher because it, too, involved caring for people (plus I loved kids!). That was my first career. My second career I’ve become a realtor (couldn’t be more different), but it’s worked for me because people are so happy to find a home, it’s super flexible in time required, I’m not stuck behind a desk, and I make enough money to cover my hobbies/passions. I think I’m rambling, but someone once said you need more than one Plan A.. you’ll have enough time in your lifetime to do more than one career, so you shouldn’t panic about getting it perfect the first time:D Just keep exploring!! xx
Exploring I will do! Thank you for sharing this! It’s always nice to hear how others are handling similar situations. I love that your daughter found her calling!! Let your son know he is NOT alone..as you can see from this post and the comments! It’s time for me to find more eggs to fill my basket!
Unless your normal blogging self is a sham, you’re clearly a bright and energetic lady – I can’t see you settling for less than what excites you, but that doesn’t keep you from exploring to find out what excites you. I went through twoish careers and was a bit lost, but am happy now. My wife kept me afloat all along, but you seem to have Manfriend and the rest to support your exploring. With your intellect and energy, and fabulous attitude, you can hardly go wrong. And I read to the end…
Thank you for your kind words! It’s comforting to know that the struggle is normal. Thank god for your wife..a strong support system is so very important! Thank you again, this comment was wonderful.
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I think I need to write you a serious email soon in regards to this post…. Let me just say, first, I love you. Second, I KNOW exactly what you/were feeling. I still have NOT A FRICKEN CLUE what I want to do with my life. It gets frustrating b/c I am done with school (My BA is done, I have two master degrees—- done! No more!) yet….. the job thing has not worked completely out for me.
And that is okay. It is okay to be in school, like you are, and not working (chances are MOST students are like that). At least you know what you are interested in and like and what you do not like. YOu have drive. You have reason enough to understand you have some big deciding to do in the future. You are aware. All those things, as tiny as they may seem, have meaning and will lead you to what you are suppose to do. I firmly believe in this.
I sound like a preacher. Anyways, hang in there and keep trying new things…. you never know what might happen.
WE should just run away and start a bed and breakfast. I think our men would support us.
I love the preacher side of you. It really does help haha. I also love the idea of running away and starting a business. If there are more people to start the business, there are more hands to ensure the business doesn’t fail!! I love you, I love your comment, I love your support, THANK YOU!
I read it all!! : ) ok seriously I’m 33 now but I managed to get to th end of my university degree (at age 21) and still not know what I wanted to do – normally people who have actually gone through all those hoops have some idea about their future life, right?
Well, it took a bit of a leap of faith or chance or whatever to make the next step but it just involved becoming more educated in what I found interesting. Without the interest it becomes very hard. If you are interested in something the chances are you will also be at least good at it. It worked for me and I’ve spent the last 10 years in the same ‘field’ of work even though the job itself has changed. Urban design is my interest and job so it’s over to you – good luck dude.
YES we would think that after completing the degree we went for that we should know what we are going to do with it! It seems that many people do the complete opposite! Your advice to pick something I am interested in couldn’t be more perfect. Thank you for sharing your story and here’s to finding my interests!
Oh wow, I read the whole thing and I totally feel you. I quit college twice, my dreams are “unrealistic” to the rest of the world and I know there are endless possibilities for me as well, yet I can’t decide which path is the one I’m going to decide on.
The way I see it is, take the one thing you want most and focus on it, save up or take necessary steps to move towards it, but don’t wreck your brain over it. Allow yourself to explore other options and figure it out. We’re young! Now is our chance to try new things, love them, hate them, start fresh, or whatever. I think it’s a beautiful thing that you’re at this point. You can do ANYTHING!
I love the idea of focusing on one goal. I find that I get overwhelmed when I focus on too much at once! Thank you for this comment! You make a great point that where we are right now is a beautiful thing.
Just focus on your cat…and your cookies. Really anything that begins with C and you’ll be fine. That said, “Conductor” begins with a C.
You speak to my soul with the most important C word of all. CAT! As I type this mine is carefully pawing at my arm for some food. Such a precious puss.
This was such a raw post to write, and I think it’s something a lot of people go through. I certainly have. Many times. I think the best any of us can do is to keep making decisions that make us happy, and stop doing the things that make us unhappy. Although stress is unfortunately that elephant in the room… for me. I need to tell myself everyday that I am stronger than stress. I can handle it. It’s almost like I am numb to it while it’s happening… and then I break down. That’s where wiine comes in
But more recently – walking, playing with my dog, a super hot shower, reading blogs 
I know you can handle whatever you decide you want to do! It’s hard choosing, but sometimes you just have to pull the trigger and go with it… and if it sucks… go for something else! Who says you have to do one thing forever? I listen to this song a lot: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTJ7AzBIJoI and the line I like the best is “Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.”
So maybe you’re not sure what you want to do with your life… but at least you’re NOT boring!
That song is so perfect! Thank you for this comment. Sometimes having a good breakdown is therapeutic for me, yet they are never fun in the middle of it ha.
OH girl. This has been my life for the past UHH year. I literally said SCREW THIS I’m doing my “exploration through Europe spring/summer that everyone takes to find themselves except I’m doing it here at home with him” So here I am… a few good months later, sort of ready to tackle the real adult world but not really. I went through so many options of personal trainer, nutritionist, being a nurse… and decided I’m going to do it all one step at a time. Honestly, even though I’m a nurse I still don’t feel like it’s what I want to do. However I guess I have to give it time and see before I make a snap judgement.
My advice I have to offer… follow your dream. Even if there are multiple ones. Figure out which one you would love to tackle first. Now is your time in life to explore options and life. It’s okay to fail. It’s okay to fall down. No one is truly expecting us to succeed right away. Whatever you feel is most important go for it OR what makes you happiest.. do it.
I’m still scared about my life and what’s in front of me but you will always have support from your family, man friend, and all of us blog buddies
I love the “exploration through Europe at home” idea!! I sorta kinda did that for a few months with just working at TJ’s. I didn’t do much self exploration though, that’s where I think I went wrong. You’ve worked SO hard to become a nurse, as a parent would say stick it out. You can always change as we’ve all learned!!
Who knows, you may just come to love it! Thank you for your comment! I LOVE YOU!
HI! I remember sooo many times during my nursing degree that I thought “Is this Really what I want to do?” There would be days that would feel like the hardest days I have ever had to endure (emotionally, or otherwise) and I felt like there was no end in sight to the whole school and being broke thing. But I was determined to finish it because I knew that I loved Nursing for what it was, and the school was just the pathway. Now that I am done, yeah I have hard days but I have days that remind me why I love nursing so much and I know that where I work now is also a stepping stone to get me to my dream area (BABIES! and FAMILIES!
….both in my job aka maternity/public health and my own life hehe). I think the key is to know that you aren’t stuck, that if you were to decide you wanted to do something that what you first decided isn’t the be-all and end-all, with nursing I can change my specialty a bazillion times, work in schools, get my masters and be a NP, or even do government work if I so desire. Do what you LOVE and what the universe pulls you towards, and even if you find out in the end you don’t like it as much as you thought, you still have so much opportunity to switch it up a bit, it sounds like you have an amazing support network! We are young girl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sv6dMFF_yts
or watch this one too because its cool and from the 80′s: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0EysM1iNMk
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX.
I love BOTH of those songs!! So perfect, thank you!! I love that you stuck with nursing, and I love how versatile it is!! I know it’s not an easy field to get into in fact most of the students in my classes were going for nursing while I was going for dental. I just have to remember that YES I am young, and it’s never too late to go after what I want! Thank you for your comment!
I graduated in May and now working …. and I must say I picked the wrong major. Don’t get me wrong. I love my job and the people that come with it but I don’t think I’m meant to be stuck behind the desk every day. :/ I can change it and go back to school but I don’t have that much energy or money to do redo college. Pick something you’ll love forever so you never have to work a day in your life … so true. Wish I knew what it was I wanted to be … I still don’t. Whoops .. sorry for the sad. haha
Ugh that’s the worst part for me..going back to school for this stuff is draining me. I have been going to school for FIVE years for dental hygiene and have nothing but an associates degree to show! I guess if it’s something I think I will love, I have to just keep fighting!! I hear you on the desk job though..that is definitely not for me either. Perhaps something else will come your way that will be just as good with little to no school requirements! Thank you for the comment!
girl I hear yah! my friend finished dental hygiene school and is now working and she loves it. but keep fighting you’ll be there soon enough making the big buckaroos!! thanks for the encouragement. I hope so too!
You had better believe I read this whole post Brittany and I kept nodding my head and agreeing to so much of what you said here! First, it was very brave of you for getting this all out there, recognizing these thoughts, and voicing them to not only yourself, but to the rest of the blog world as well! That can be scary and anxiety-provoking at times, so please pat yourself on the back for your kick butt attitude. Second, you are one tough cookie for staying positive throughout this entire situation and time in your life… not everyone is capable of doing this, that’s for sure! I admit that I feel so similar to you right now. Yes I am in school but I am not entirely if it’s what I want, what I am going to do after, what I would be doing anyway without it… gahh LIFE is POOP sometimes. That is all
Yup. POOP.
But man, imagine a life without POOP? That would suck. lol
I guess it has it’s place.
Keep your chin up girls!!
Yes I read every last bit. And boy oh boy I can relate. Now allow me to say — listen and respect your elder — that you are exactly where you are supposed to be right now.
Maybe not last week or so…the rut with the sleeping and appetite and dare I say ..but still that was necessary.
Right here, right now. With this post. You are ready now to start addressing things. Just do one thing at a time, okay? One thing. At a time. Just first things first. You are young, you open, you are motivated you are EXACTLY where you need to be right now. |
Follow your bliss.
I am finding peace in the sentence you just said..”you are exactly where you are supposed to be right now.” SO true!! Thank you for your comment!
And don’t forget to breathe….all the time. walking, talking, eating tacos, in the shower. Just breathe.
i read every single word
it’s like youre taking words out of my mouth! i can absolutely relate to this and i’m glad you wrote about it on your blog. did it make u feel slightly better ?
yes, putting yourself out there is a really vulnerable place to be. but sometimes you have to do it to FEEL, to assess exactly where u are at. most of the time i just hold it in and tell myself nothing is wrong, and that everything is going just fine. doing that is a huge stress on me, but i always thought it would make me a stronger person. once in a while ill let it out by writing in my diary, and it’s the best stress relief ever.
friends and family can make this rollar coaster ride easier, but it’s up to the voice inside your own head to help you conquer your fears.
you might feel out of place right now, but things will fall in place. im pretty sure that most ppl out there who already have a career are second guessing their choices and are prob in the same boat as you. everyone goes through this, it’s healthy
for now, go listen to alanis morrisette’s “hand in my pocket”. it works magic and turns my bad mood 180 degrees
As a matter of fact..I did feel a bit better
. There is definitely more inside that I will get out..soon I hope!! Being vulnerable isn’t so bad after all! Loveee that song, thank you for your comment!
oh my gosh i adore you and this blog! i love you and you’re awesome and i think you’re doing an awesome job of openly and honestly figuring things out!
Ohh I love you!! Thank you for the smile!
and i hope you love that i used the word “awesome” twice in one small comment
Oh goodness, Brittany! You and I are twins right now. Like you said, this is exactly where I’m at too which you saw in my post. It’s so hard. I worried myself sick last week to the point where I had no appetite and if I did eat I couldn’t keep it down, no energy to workout, no will to even get out of bed. I was hopeless.
But thanks to my man and a kick swift in the FACE I am finding the silver lining. We’re young… let’s embrace this and roll with the punches. Just remember you are NOT alone. I got yo back girl